giegie is back in kuching!! home sweet home :)
supposed to accomplish the last group assignment and courier it asap...then ended up chatting, and chatting. then went down awhile at midnight, CJ suddenly came to my room, wearing his school uniform, and started spilling out his worries for next year. i realised every year he will spill out to me once or twice, did not wanna disappoint him so listened to him, and gave him some big-sister advice which i dunno is useful onot. it's like i can say nia, want me to do also cannot. study-wise, CJ's so like me. i see a lot of me in him actually, being the school girl, studying until so called "wanna die". but we still enjoy school, and love school. this boy is actually worrying so much, and most ppl will think he's the happy-go-lucky playful boy who never grows up. well this sister can tell he's grown. all he needs is more shown-love, more attention. all the best to CJ in the form3 he dreads. kampatei!
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Saturday, December 22, 2007
drawing the fullstop (.)
These 3years in KL... from 412L -- 160M -- 108C -- 175Q.
From the 3rd floor -- 2nd floor -- 1st floor -- ground floor.
haha kinda cool, aint it?
Each had memories for me to cherish.
Now i'm really gonna leave i dunno how much i will miss this place, although i really never liked it. Tonight will be the last night in 175Q, and i cant relax and enjoy the night, having millions of unfinished tasks!! /cry.
1. MEC147 Exam. (i'm still as bad, the lousy student who gets a total headache when it comes to memorising complicated words. last minute. sleepy. struggling. complaining.)
2. Practicum 1. (only survivor in cohort 3. they all gave up. 159/180hours. i'm actually doing great here. but tonight is just bad.)
3. CLS141. (Carmen the torturer for the last subject. finished drawing. 2 more to colour. havent write.)
4. Souvenirs for lecturers and cohort 3 mates. (just collected the souvenirs d+m brought over. need wrap? yes, dun kill me. no, how to give lecturers?)
5. PACKING! (i have to make this room empty by tmr morning. and all i've packed is 2 boxes.)
about only 12hours left to accomplish all these tasks!!! HOW?!
God bless me.
From the 3rd floor -- 2nd floor -- 1st floor -- ground floor.
haha kinda cool, aint it?
Each had memories for me to cherish.
Now i'm really gonna leave i dunno how much i will miss this place, although i really never liked it. Tonight will be the last night in 175Q, and i cant relax and enjoy the night, having millions of unfinished tasks!! /cry.
1. MEC147 Exam. (i'm still as bad, the lousy student who gets a total headache when it comes to memorising complicated words. last minute. sleepy. struggling. complaining.)
2. Practicum 1. (only survivor in cohort 3. they all gave up. 159/180hours. i'm actually doing great here. but tonight is just bad.)
3. CLS141. (Carmen the torturer for the last subject. finished drawing. 2 more to colour. havent write.)
4. Souvenirs for lecturers and cohort 3 mates. (just collected the souvenirs d+m brought over. need wrap? yes, dun kill me. no, how to give lecturers?)
5. PACKING! (i have to make this room empty by tmr morning. and all i've packed is 2 boxes.)
about only 12hours left to accomplish all these tasks!!! HOW?!
God bless me.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
pathetic ads!!
time is tight!! getting scared already. yet i can still waste time. me ah....
im so bored of doing work i remembered mr mohan's saying about his daughter searching his name in IE. i've done that before, long long time ago, discovering my name being a RC member & blablabla. i did the same thing today, but searching for peiwen. many ppl having this name, and a girl, 20, the intro sounded interesting. so i clicked in, only to find that they brought me to a page full of porns. pathetic ads!! cheap! i tried some other names, and the same thing happened, just a different site. i wonder if it's because my comp is unprotected by antivirus now? shit! unable to dL free software after deleting the expired one. gawd.. how i wish i was more computer savvy!!
im so bored of doing work i remembered mr mohan's saying about his daughter searching his name in IE. i've done that before, long long time ago, discovering my name being a RC member & blablabla. i did the same thing today, but searching for peiwen. many ppl having this name, and a girl, 20, the intro sounded interesting. so i clicked in, only to find that they brought me to a page full of porns. pathetic ads!! cheap! i tried some other names, and the same thing happened, just a different site. i wonder if it's because my comp is unprotected by antivirus now? shit! unable to dL free software after deleting the expired one. gawd.. how i wish i was more computer savvy!!
Monday, December 17, 2007
the vague figure
suddenly, just suddenly.
a picture, a scene appeared in front of my eyes.
there was a car. he was driving. we were both very quiet. then i took over and drove. still very quiet. eyes only looking in front. driving to a destination where there's nobody at all. there wasnt a picture of the place. i got down of the car. he followed. i just shouted. and stopped. and shouted again. really shouted with all my energy. it repeated for a few times. he just stood there beside me. until i collapsed on his shoulder and cried. until finally i was smiling again, thanking him and telling him that i havent cried in such a long time. it felt really good. but the face was vague. it was just a shadowy figure. a very quiet shadowy figure... but i knew it was there...
a picture, a scene appeared in front of my eyes.
there was a car. he was driving. we were both very quiet. then i took over and drove. still very quiet. eyes only looking in front. driving to a destination where there's nobody at all. there wasnt a picture of the place. i got down of the car. he followed. i just shouted. and stopped. and shouted again. really shouted with all my energy. it repeated for a few times. he just stood there beside me. until i collapsed on his shoulder and cried. until finally i was smiling again, thanking him and telling him that i havent cried in such a long time. it felt really good. but the face was vague. it was just a shadowy figure. a very quiet shadowy figure... but i knew it was there...
-VE day
today everything just seemed so negative since the minute i opened my eyes. i havent slept well for the past few nights. now i hate this room so much, feeling that there's so much negative energy in here. once i step into this room, it's just work. im racing with time!! i feel so tired. so so tired. whose big arms and broad shoulders would be here to hold my head which feels so heavy now? im going out tmr for the sake of going out. not so looking forward actually, with this bunch of ppl. CC & EU. so used to making decisions last minute with my buddies, so spontaneous as long as everyone enjoyed in the end. why have to force me. and always throw the decision to me. "you're leaving." ok im leaving. but they asked me out! cant you just plan?! make me so "fan"!!! shud have ignored all of them, and just date a time with SJ alone. with WL alone. and LL. cant we just enjoy a nice and peaceful day together? we dont even know when we'll ever meet again.
sometimes i feel so so silly. feeling frustrated but pretending to laugh. feeling unhappy but pretending to smile. feel like scolding bad words but such nice words came out from my mouth. wanting some enemies but all came about being my friends. dont i understand that a clap doesnt sound complete without two hands? it's better to have just a few true friends. some enemies are ok. LEARN TO BE EVIL!! it makes life simpler.
sometimes i feel so so silly. feeling frustrated but pretending to laugh. feeling unhappy but pretending to smile. feel like scolding bad words but such nice words came out from my mouth. wanting some enemies but all came about being my friends. dont i understand that a clap doesnt sound complete without two hands? it's better to have just a few true friends. some enemies are ok. LEARN TO BE EVIL!! it makes life simpler.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
tun tun ho lai, tun tun pai poi
my right eye has been jumping for 3 continuous days. grr!
3 sayings: too tired. someone miss me. i wanna fight with someone.
mummy says do this:
use your thumb and pointer to hold up the eyelid,
open close open close.
(showing me through handphone. yes i can see.)
then say,
tun tun tun
tun tun ho lai
tun tun pai poi zhao
poi hui hui
really laugh till wanna pengsan liao. dear mummy, mummy!!
3 sayings: too tired. someone miss me. i wanna fight with someone.
mummy says do this:
use your thumb and pointer to hold up the eyelid,
open close open close.
(showing me through handphone. yes i can see.)
then say,
tun tun tun
tun tun ho lai
tun tun pai poi zhao
poi hui hui
really laugh till wanna pengsan liao. dear mummy, mummy!!
Friday, December 14, 2007
muMMy and daughteRs' daY
I went to LCMH today. The new faces, the familiar faces. It has only been 3weeks, but seems like I've been long for quite some time. Lucky everything there still looked so familiar, so welcoming, so comfy. Mrs Teoh brought Wai Nee, Jamie & me to the Lagoon Hotel for lunch. (Su wasn't able to join us.) The famous buffet was closed so we had ala carte. The food wasn't great then, but we had a table of giggles, so called mother-daughters lunch. Then we had a walk by the beautiful poolside, took photos like camera freaks, enjoying it. We went to see Mrs Teoh's new centre, Montessori for Children. Nice place. We went to the beauty saloon she once set up, beautiful place. This lady really has talent! Then we went for tea again. Home we went. Was also nice getting to know more of Wai Nee and Jamie. Guess this is what all daughters would like to do with their mothers? Hanging out for no particular reason, talking about serious stuffs but also laughing about silly things together, mummy paying the bills(haha). But well, mummy is mummy. She's special in her own way ;) I just love to be pampered, don't i? I wonder if all other boys and girls also feel the same way? More or less? We're born to love and to be loved, right? and LOVE really heals!!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
an eye for an eye (; ;)
an eye for an eye ;)
it's a full day class and we've been drawing for the whole day. my friends were trying to wash my brain and persuading me to stay. not that i've never considered the pros and cons, but guess i've had enough of life in KL. i want to go home. though i might have a more tiring day, earn less. but be more happy? and comfy? and pampered :)
why do some friends only drew closer when it's time to leave? i will miss them, somehow. no matter what we've all gone through this 2 years 4 months in this pathetic college, good or bad, but yet feel that we've gained so much here, and also grown a lot together! glad to be in cohort 3. chose the right time to join DIKA :)
an eye for an eye ;) stay happy and healthy.
it's a full day class and we've been drawing for the whole day. my friends were trying to wash my brain and persuading me to stay. not that i've never considered the pros and cons, but guess i've had enough of life in KL. i want to go home. though i might have a more tiring day, earn less. but be more happy? and comfy? and pampered :)
why do some friends only drew closer when it's time to leave? i will miss them, somehow. no matter what we've all gone through this 2 years 4 months in this pathetic college, good or bad, but yet feel that we've gained so much here, and also grown a lot together! glad to be in cohort 3. chose the right time to join DIKA :)
an eye for an eye ;) stay happy and healthy.
Friday, December 07, 2007
许愿！
在马中公园许愿池许愿，今天是第二次。下午刚许的愿，现在竟然忘记了。上一次的也没记得，看来我都没认真许愿吧。可是我却让别人认真许愿了，还说我笨？哈哈。两个多小时愿望就实现了？虾米？！
雨不停的下，冷风吹，鸟儿却好像一点也不受影响的自由飞行。猫熊不时不时就数数有几只小鸟停泊在那，看起来很兴奋，让小猫有点疑惑。不是小猫看到小鸟该兴奋的吗？猫熊和小猫坐在那里没怎么动，被雨淋了都发冷。猫熊发现了小猫黄黄手掌中的三条线。小猫发现了猫熊拇指上的脚拇趾。猫熊和小猫，说着不同的语言，却有他们自己沟通到很自然的方式。晕。
雨不停的下，冷风吹，鸟儿却好像一点也不受影响的自由飞行。猫熊不时不时就数数有几只小鸟停泊在那，看起来很兴奋，让小猫有点疑惑。不是小猫看到小鸟该兴奋的吗？猫熊和小猫坐在那里没怎么动，被雨淋了都发冷。猫熊发现了小猫黄黄手掌中的三条线。小猫发现了猫熊拇指上的脚拇趾。猫熊和小猫，说着不同的语言，却有他们自己沟通到很自然的方式。晕。
Thursday, December 06, 2007
九年以后的他
今晚终于见到他了。九年。但感觉上一点也不陌生。跟照片中有点不一样。跟以前更不一样。不高不矮不胖不瘦。怕冷怕热。有着奇怪的记忆。关于我，我自己都不太记得。驾车一点也不酷，哈哈。路痴。竟然约我明天玩飞机棋？流汗！
Monday, December 03, 2007
曾经
看着爸妈心血来潮忽然整理那已堆积了十多年各式各样的旧衣服，很多回忆自然也掀起吧。妈很兴奋地拿起一件连身裙：“你记得这件吧？你在外婆家外穿这裙拍了一张照片咧！是你爸在新加坡买的。”“还有这件……”我随手拿起一件红色米奇鼠的裤子：“这件我记得，还有蓝色一样款式的！”爸看起来忽然有点内疚说：“这样也记得？！老实说你姐的真的买了好多好多，你的较少。”“是咯，我们都总是把你打扮成小男孩。”哼，看照片我也知道啊，生我的时候他们都想要个儿子，因为前面原本有的哥哥吧。可能因为这样我也比较有男孩气质吧，不会太有女人味，也总是太坚强想哭都哭不出来。不过幸亏 我还是在充满爱的环境里成长的，才有现在富有爱心的赖佩雯嘛！哈哈。
后来整理到爸不要的衣服了，妈却怎么都不舍得丢或给人。他们在那里抢来抢去很好笑，妈又把全部抱在怀里爸输了，哈哈。妈说那些都有回忆，她说了爸也只能“哇”一声摇摇头。有点无奈的表情，又好像很佩服妈这女人。呵呵，忽然记得我也曾经珍藏某些衣服呢！初恋第一次牵手穿的那件红色背心，好像还在橱里呢！原来我不是唯一的奇怪女人。女人本性吗？还是那些醉于爱河里的女人就会有某些特技呢？有些记忆得刻意去记得，不然就逐渐逐渐的忘记了；有些却好像已经是记忆的一部分了，不管怎么洗也洗不掉了。
昨天他忽然打来了。期待已久却紧张之余说不太出话来。他的声音，我完全没印象也不记得是这么man的。九年了，从来都没有偶然碰见，也没联络过。今年七月，他忽然打来家里，拿了我的电话，终于联络上我了。他记得关于我的东西比较多，不过努力想想后也忽然记得关于他的一些事情了，让他很惊讶，哈哈。时常在网上聊天，好像忽然彼此就变得很要好，好像已经彼此认识很久的朋友，因此都很期待见面。照片中他的脸没怎么变，只是没以前那么肥嘟嘟了，嘻嘻。还曾经给我画得一幅画猫样，哈哈爽！快要见面了，这个人到底会是怎样的呢？
后来整理到爸不要的衣服了，妈却怎么都不舍得丢或给人。他们在那里抢来抢去很好笑，妈又把全部抱在怀里爸输了，哈哈。妈说那些都有回忆，她说了爸也只能“哇”一声摇摇头。有点无奈的表情，又好像很佩服妈这女人。呵呵，忽然记得我也曾经珍藏某些衣服呢！初恋第一次牵手穿的那件红色背心，好像还在橱里呢！原来我不是唯一的奇怪女人。女人本性吗？还是那些醉于爱河里的女人就会有某些特技呢？有些记忆得刻意去记得，不然就逐渐逐渐的忘记了；有些却好像已经是记忆的一部分了，不管怎么洗也洗不掉了。
昨天他忽然打来了。期待已久却紧张之余说不太出话来。他的声音，我完全没印象也不记得是这么man的。九年了，从来都没有偶然碰见，也没联络过。今年七月，他忽然打来家里，拿了我的电话，终于联络上我了。他记得关于我的东西比较多，不过努力想想后也忽然记得关于他的一些事情了，让他很惊讶，哈哈。时常在网上聊天，好像忽然彼此就变得很要好，好像已经彼此认识很久的朋友，因此都很期待见面。照片中他的脸没怎么变，只是没以前那么肥嘟嘟了，嘻嘻。还曾经给我画得一幅画猫样，哈哈爽！快要见面了，这个人到底会是怎样的呢？
Saturday, December 01, 2007
狮子心情
最近爱上吵音乐，听到熟悉歌曲就跟着大声哼大声唱。也莫名其妙会在没其他人的情况下自己乱乱大声喊一下两下。也超级讨厌下雨天。也变得较小气较容易发脾气。心情真的这么烂吗？还是我初级疯了？很不喜欢这样的自己啊！连蚊子都叮我了啦！！
Saturday, November 24, 2007
~day of departures~
i had to depart with so many people today. first is xuan. the last night we spent together was at tony's. then my room, doing christmas wordings for the mural. then we talked and talked. then we slept. 2hours i managed to sleep, then i was turning round and round, then looking at her sleep. this friend of mine, made subang somehow less lonely at nights, and is there to listen. i'll miss her!!
the whole last night i was thinking about today. all the departures. i felt so full, like up to the throat. but my tears never came out. feel abit suffocated actually. couldnt sleep, so got up to make a card. since my room's so small, i stood up to do the card, and she thought i was exercising?! haha really funny. i went to work early, and we had water play. all so totally wet, having real fun with the kids. cant help but kept cuddling them. when the day finally ended, it's like, my duty for the year in LCMH is accomplished! i miss every single one in LCMH, a small nice group with lovely people. of coz it all ended with dear mrs teoh again, giving me another present, and this time i gave her a real hug of mine, but she hugged back so dearly and firmly, until i really felt like the princess diaries. i wasnt rigid this time, really enjoying the hug :) it's the BIG HUG i had longed for since so long ago but there was no one to really hug. she taught me actually how to hug a big person, and that hugging can really give you the sense of comfort. it'll always be my favourite sign of affection.
(im like talking about hugging a lot recently. finding back lost times i guess. mrs teoh is really someone i'll miss so much!! and few of the lil monsters!! all but the few especially, hehe. a sure thing rite?? hehe.)
first time ever i received so many gifts and wishes in one week! touched definitely. and i really hope that i did do a good job throughout this year :) at least according to my DAP? haha.
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the whole last night i was thinking about today. all the departures. i felt so full, like up to the throat. but my tears never came out. feel abit suffocated actually. couldnt sleep, so got up to make a card. since my room's so small, i stood up to do the card, and she thought i was exercising?! haha really funny. i went to work early, and we had water play. all so totally wet, having real fun with the kids. cant help but kept cuddling them. when the day finally ended, it's like, my duty for the year in LCMH is accomplished! i miss every single one in LCMH, a small nice group with lovely people. of coz it all ended with dear mrs teoh again, giving me another present, and this time i gave her a real hug of mine, but she hugged back so dearly and firmly, until i really felt like the princess diaries. i wasnt rigid this time, really enjoying the hug :) it's the BIG HUG i had longed for since so long ago but there was no one to really hug. she taught me actually how to hug a big person, and that hugging can really give you the sense of comfort. it'll always be my favourite sign of affection.
(im like talking about hugging a lot recently. finding back lost times i guess. mrs teoh is really someone i'll miss so much!! and few of the lil monsters!! all but the few especially, hehe. a sure thing rite?? hehe.)
first time ever i received so many gifts and wishes in one week! touched definitely. and i really hope that i did do a good job throughout this year :) at least according to my DAP? haha.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
hug hug
i like to hug. the feeling of being cuddled by someone, and cuddling someone yourself. but both will not be seeing each other's face, just using the heart to feel... but somehow, tonight i had had sooo many hugs!! and i actually became quite rigid, not really spontaneous in responding. when children hugged me, it was like im so used to it already, but never bored to hug them. when parents came to hug, weird. very weird. hugging a quite stranger. then Mrs. Teoh was like hugging me and Su almost the whole night. it was her hugs that really touched my heart. she said so many good things, but my tears were tough. when the night ended, she gave the greatest hug i had in such a long time, so motherly i wished i could stay cuddled like that a whole night. just to feel pampered. she said i was her goddaughter, and kissed both sides of my cheeks. i was really speechless that time, and just relented. i love her. and i'm happy i had worked with her. she's one person who has seen the best and worst parts of me. she's an inspiring teacher and boss, a wonderful listener, an amazing friend, and sometimes plays a very motherly role. thank you so much, mrs. teoh. i'll definitely miss her =.=
Sunday, November 11, 2007
kim joo yeh gie
When i first saw this, it just so reminds me of us 4.
i just love these friends sooo much!!Wednesday, November 07, 2007
ahMah, wa sio le =.=
ahMah, ki meh hu lang keng jing sio le. ki tik teng pai wa tak jik ta tiok ai ka diang uey hok le, bo ta mik kai pun ta tiok ai ka, pang lok zheng du kiss le jik eh. ki tik le tak pai toh pang keng jiang "ahBung!" wa du zhao bio tik meh ke le pang keng kak le pang hong ill, tak koh-yiok. hu lang keng jing siang mong eh tiok le, siok le, ahmah ko si aneh qin ai de ahmah. ahmah ai ho ho zho sing, hua hi hua hi, pung ai po pi ahbung kak kut lak, hua hua hi hi mai sio aneh zhoi. jin sio le, ahmah. =*=
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
sneezing queen
wahh i can be sneezing queen liao today! grr!!
i hate flu. i hate sorethroat. i hate to not feeling so well.
i dun miss home currently but EXTREMELY looking forward to go home. makes sense not?
today i woke up late. felt sick and dun feel like going to work. but still went. thank god got rich party today, really rich ah these children! or parents la. so whole day party mood, lazy mood, sneezing mood... i pun curi tulang today lah... or better way to say, im INTERACTING WITH CHILDREN! hehe. it so came up with the topic "you love me onot?" when little Bernice clung onto me like rubber, really boneless! haha. duhh of course i got a yes la. haha, i knowww these darlings lurvvve me. after that i felt silly asking such question, sounds so desperado. apu~ but there's this little 4yr-old, aiyer dunno next time how. she kissed me, then asked me to kiss her, so i kissed her forehead. then she said, kiss my cheek. ok. then came kiss my eye. wowh, too much!! no no no! haha. well, it's really nice being around children, when they are being GOOD. but guess that's how i always get sick also. their virus like never end one! yrrr!!
i hate flu. i hate sorethroat. i hate to not feeling so well.
i dun miss home currently but EXTREMELY looking forward to go home. makes sense not?
today i woke up late. felt sick and dun feel like going to work. but still went. thank god got rich party today, really rich ah these children! or parents la. so whole day party mood, lazy mood, sneezing mood... i pun curi tulang today lah... or better way to say, im INTERACTING WITH CHILDREN! hehe. it so came up with the topic "you love me onot?" when little Bernice clung onto me like rubber, really boneless! haha. duhh of course i got a yes la. haha, i knowww these darlings lurvvve me. after that i felt silly asking such question, sounds so desperado. apu~ but there's this little 4yr-old, aiyer dunno next time how. she kissed me, then asked me to kiss her, so i kissed her forehead. then she said, kiss my cheek. ok. then came kiss my eye. wowh, too much!! no no no! haha. well, it's really nice being around children, when they are being GOOD. but guess that's how i always get sick also. their virus like never end one! yrrr!!
Thursday, November 01, 2007
new november :)
i've started my november with eyes wide open in front of my laptop screen!
tired. sleepy. but i need to finish this assignment tonite as aimed!! my dictionary has helped me a lot. can i bring this heavy book with me overseas? my english really sucks. my mandarin sucks too. my bm no need say lah. why everything pun bad? cham liao me.
well, well. i'm actually looking forward to this november. dunno why. any upcoming surprises? stay tuned! haha. dont disappoint me ar---me tokking to meself :p
tired. sleepy. but i need to finish this assignment tonite as aimed!! my dictionary has helped me a lot. can i bring this heavy book with me overseas? my english really sucks. my mandarin sucks too. my bm no need say lah. why everything pun bad? cham liao me.
well, well. i'm actually looking forward to this november. dunno why. any upcoming surprises? stay tuned! haha. dont disappoint me ar---me tokking to meself :p
Monday, October 29, 2007
My Colour Profile?
Well, i only chose from the limited colours available and i got these... (suits abit though ;)
you can try it out: http://vn247.net/flash/Color-and-Me.swf
1) i chose a RED house. (odd i know. i tot only one question. and red is my aeroplane colour.)
You have a strong personality that likes to take risks if the rewards are worth it. You don't like being told what to do and prefer to take matters into your own hands.
**seems abit like it? in some situations. gotta find out more about myself about this, hehe.
2) i chose a YELLOW shirt. (the yellow looked nicer here)
You are bubbly and approachable. Unrestricted by the latest fashion trends, you buy clothes only when they look good on you.
**but i do buy clothes that suits me nia. i'm bubbly?
3) i chose a PINK rose. (hehe, nice ler.)
Variety is the spice of life! You are comfortable in any crowd or situation, and always come away with new friends.
**Variety is a spice of life! absolutely!! comfortable anyhow, depends la...
4) i chose a GREY car. (not so adventurous car driver yet.)
You value highly what is important to you. Some people may find your possessions a little out of fashion, but you don't mind as they appeal to your taste.
** haha, im abit the old-fashioned. yes, yes! bear with me :)
5) i chose a BLACK handphone. (i wanted a white one actually.)
Business often takes priority to social occasions. You are aggressive in business, but tend to take the backseat when it comes to your personal life.
**no idea about this. yet.
6) i chose a BROWN bear. (bears. haha. i dont so fancy bears. brown is a normal colour.)
You are a no-nonsense, practical person. You make sure that you are there when your friends need you, and like to solve their problems for them.
**well i dont know how to solve their problems, but i hope i can make them feel better :)
you can try it out: http://vn247.net/flash/Color-and-Me.swf
1) i chose a RED house. (odd i know. i tot only one question. and red is my aeroplane colour.)
You have a strong personality that likes to take risks if the rewards are worth it. You don't like being told what to do and prefer to take matters into your own hands.
**seems abit like it? in some situations. gotta find out more about myself about this, hehe.
2) i chose a YELLOW shirt. (the yellow looked nicer here)
You are bubbly and approachable. Unrestricted by the latest fashion trends, you buy clothes only when they look good on you.
**but i do buy clothes that suits me nia. i'm bubbly?
3) i chose a PINK rose. (hehe, nice ler.)
Variety is the spice of life! You are comfortable in any crowd or situation, and always come away with new friends.
**Variety is a spice of life! absolutely!! comfortable anyhow, depends la...
4) i chose a GREY car. (not so adventurous car driver yet.)
You value highly what is important to you. Some people may find your possessions a little out of fashion, but you don't mind as they appeal to your taste.
** haha, im abit the old-fashioned. yes, yes! bear with me :)
5) i chose a BLACK handphone. (i wanted a white one actually.)
Business often takes priority to social occasions. You are aggressive in business, but tend to take the backseat when it comes to your personal life.
**no idea about this. yet.
6) i chose a BROWN bear. (bears. haha. i dont so fancy bears. brown is a normal colour.)
You are a no-nonsense, practical person. You make sure that you are there when your friends need you, and like to solve their problems for them.
**well i dont know how to solve their problems, but i hope i can make them feel better :)
Thursday, October 25, 2007
i feel so motionless. so static. so stationary. so still.
i seem to REFUSE to move. i'm not doing anything. this is so so bad.
i'm being rebellious to my mind. not doing what it wanted me to do. or supposed to do. (in most situations. why do i always lose to myself? i hate this me.)
my ears...so fragile...dunno wat yucky 'water' coming out non-stop!! i just wore fake ear-rings for less than a day!!! ouch!
i miss my buddies. i miss home.
and yea, have i changed?
i seem to REFUSE to move. i'm not doing anything. this is so so bad.
i'm being rebellious to my mind. not doing what it wanted me to do. or supposed to do. (in most situations. why do i always lose to myself? i hate this me.)
my ears...so fragile...dunno wat yucky 'water' coming out non-stop!! i just wore fake ear-rings for less than a day!!! ouch!
i miss my buddies. i miss home.
and yea, have i changed?
Friday, October 19, 2007
my qiu-kap-mo-dik MOU-TAK-TENG chabo friends!
i love my qiu-kap-mo-dik MOU-TAK-TENG chabo friends!!
kimmie babey, jacnene the boony boon boon, xuan dear dear...
you girls are there almost every minute when i most needed someone to pamper me and make me drive on! this terrible month would be really awwwfuL without you girls. luvya dearies~~ muaxxxX!!
kimmie babey, jacnene the boony boon boon, xuan dear dear...
you girls are there almost every minute when i most needed someone to pamper me and make me drive on! this terrible month would be really awwwfuL without you girls. luvya dearies~~ muaxxxX!!
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
this cat is really cute. but be careful. it has hidden cruelties. hoho. you can hardly see the words if the picture is small!
i was actually so tired of doing work, and went to google photos to search "kill". believe it not? haha.
I FOUND THE KILLER.
not telling who's the target :p
a way of releasing stress? erm..maybe.
i realised that i like to look for pictures that suits my emotions at that time. weirdo you can call me.
跟爸聊起我TBS的朋友。她们都今年底毕业，是有点羡慕啦。爸问我有没有后悔，我说没有。“那样就好了。”有那一丝丝的感动，但知道他心里多希望我也是跟她们一起今年底就毕业的。爸一直都默默的支持我，我有说不出也表达不出的感动。他不多问，但他会让你自然的向他倾诉，因为他很耐心的听；他话不多说，但他好像什么都知道。现在好想抱抱爸爸...抱得紧紧的...
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Saturday, October 13, 2007
after that beautiful 2909, i somehow felt that i lost a good friend. why? a used-to-be chatty friend who keeps me motivated during my downs, a jovial friend who makes me laugh and smile. suddenly just came the silence. the kind of silence i seem to not like. just tell me why. hate it this way! shit. or maybe i should stay away, until you remember the presence of this friend again? or unless you wanna keep our friendship this way, which i won't ever call it friendship anymore. but why?!!
after listening to bl's story, i really hope that i had left good memories to the one i onced love. i hope there're no regrets although we finally knew that the puzzles don't match. i hope the memories we once shared will stay pure sweet and simple. i believe the puzzles will fit in somewhere. someday.
:):)
:):)
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Friday, October 05, 2007
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Sunday, September 30, 2007
the light called 'you'
i've always lived my life alone, destiny forgotten
but in a sudden light
i awaken
in the middle of the night
quietly
stand in the doorway
and shoot the light into the darkness
perhaps the promises that we have made
will only make you feel uneasy
but those promises were just my wishes that i have about us
i'll introduce you to my family
i'm sure you'll get along with them
no matter the time
we'll always be together
no matter the time
i'll be by your side
the light called 'you' finds me
in the middle of the night
enter a noisy street
and put on the mask of destiny
stop doing meaningless things
like reading too much into our future
let's just eat something delicious for today
because the future is so far ahead of us
even i dont know what will happen
dont consider this the final cut
we can make it even better
we'll be ok if we take it one scene at a time
the light called 'you' reflects my scenario
let's talk some more
about the tomorrow thats before our very eyes
turn off the tv
and look only at me
no matter how good our life is now
i dont completely believe that it will always be this way
but even if the bad times come
i'll still be by your side
the light called 'you' finds me
in the middle of the night
lets talk some more
about the tomorrow thats before our very eyes
turn off the tv
and look only at me
---Utada Hikaru 〈Hikari〉
but in a sudden light
i awaken
in the middle of the night
quietly
stand in the doorway
and shoot the light into the darkness
perhaps the promises that we have made
will only make you feel uneasy
but those promises were just my wishes that i have about us
i'll introduce you to my family
i'm sure you'll get along with them
no matter the time
we'll always be together
no matter the time
i'll be by your side
the light called 'you' finds me
in the middle of the night
enter a noisy street
and put on the mask of destiny
stop doing meaningless things
like reading too much into our future
let's just eat something delicious for today
because the future is so far ahead of us
even i dont know what will happen
dont consider this the final cut
we can make it even better
we'll be ok if we take it one scene at a time
the light called 'you' reflects my scenario
let's talk some more
about the tomorrow thats before our very eyes
turn off the tv
and look only at me
no matter how good our life is now
i dont completely believe that it will always be this way
but even if the bad times come
i'll still be by your side
the light called 'you' finds me
in the middle of the night
lets talk some more
about the tomorrow thats before our very eyes
turn off the tv
and look only at me
---Utada Hikaru 〈Hikari〉
Saturday, September 29, 2007
the beautiful lie
today is a good day, today is a nice day... and it all started with a beautiful lie? i don't want to do it again, coz it really set my nerves up! not every lie works so smoothly, but today is really a day reserved for me :) TO BE HAPPY =D
i was late, but i felt really appreciated by my little darlings.
i told a lie, but got things back with my boss. we were finally like good friends again. back to the good old days.
the broken promise, we couldn't go to Kenny Rogers, but i get to enjoy my bath rather than rush there right after work.
i missed the bus, but got to message my dear buddies about my great day.
it ended up to be a duo-meeting again, but i got to buy my handsome sweater. seldom do i fall so in love with a guy's shirt and missed it so much! if i had a boyfriend, that sweater would definitely be for him. i tried it on, and it still looked awesome on my handsome body. hiakz. i HAD TO buy it. muax!
i had to wait for buka puasa with the mcD food on the table right in front of me, very very funny feeling. but now i have this once-in-a-lifetime-experience. you should try, haha.
i reached home quite late, but finally got a message from the stumbling block. i can't say it's sweet, but it made me feel sweet. somehow. that's how silly i am.
but in all, it's a really WONDERFUL day. smile :) smile :) smile :)
i was late, but i felt really appreciated by my little darlings.
i told a lie, but got things back with my boss. we were finally like good friends again. back to the good old days.
the broken promise, we couldn't go to Kenny Rogers, but i get to enjoy my bath rather than rush there right after work.
i missed the bus, but got to message my dear buddies about my great day.
it ended up to be a duo-meeting again, but i got to buy my handsome sweater. seldom do i fall so in love with a guy's shirt and missed it so much! if i had a boyfriend, that sweater would definitely be for him. i tried it on, and it still looked awesome on my handsome body. hiakz. i HAD TO buy it. muax!
i had to wait for buka puasa with the mcD food on the table right in front of me, very very funny feeling. but now i have this once-in-a-lifetime-experience. you should try, haha.
i reached home quite late, but finally got a message from the stumbling block. i can't say it's sweet, but it made me feel sweet. somehow. that's how silly i am.
but in all, it's a really WONDERFUL day. smile :) smile :) smile :)
Friday, September 28, 2007
my emotional "it"
i hope my heart give me the right hints.
i wish it could tell me what to do, and lead me the directions, letting me arrive soundly at my dreamed destinations...
it only seems to do the right thing when it is happy...
it's like not functioning when it's sad.
why so emotional?
it's just an "IT" ya know?!
i wish it could tell me what to do, and lead me the directions, letting me arrive soundly at my dreamed destinations...
it only seems to do the right thing when it is happy...
it's like not functioning when it's sad.
why so emotional?
it's just an "IT" ya know?!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
今年中秋并没有想象中孤单。我们吃着月饼‘假装赏月’，哈哈，还配印度炒饭和超甜的美禄沙冰！真不够中秋风味，哈哈。月亮今夜很圆很亮，很美。因为忘了拿钥匙，让我多走在街上几步，感觉上好久没这样望着夜空漫步。这时候好想有个人牵着我的手...再借我宽宽的肩膀依靠。很傻又很舒心。很多回忆顿时像钢琴声响起...大声的小声的，好听的难听的，有旋律的乱七八糟的......月亮好像想告诉我什么似的......但我还没有学会月亮的语言~~
只是忽然想起了那首奇怪的诗...
tonight, there was this round bright eye staring at me.
It follows me around the bush, around the bend of the road,
constantly piercing me with its sharp stares from behind.
Everywhere i go, there it was with its bright staring eye.
When i just about to reach home, suddenly it appears in front of me
and i stopped, trying to decide what to do
as i looked at it and it looks at me: one thing occurs to me, it is just as lonely as i am
but here i am looking at it, someone out there is doing the same thing too
i realised how lucky i am to be able to see warm night light*~~~
只是忽然想起了那首奇怪的诗...
tonight, there was this round bright eye staring at me.
It follows me around the bush, around the bend of the road,
constantly piercing me with its sharp stares from behind.
Everywhere i go, there it was with its bright staring eye.
When i just about to reach home, suddenly it appears in front of me
and i stopped, trying to decide what to do
as i looked at it and it looks at me: one thing occurs to me, it is just as lonely as i am
but here i am looking at it, someone out there is doing the same thing too
i realised how lucky i am to be able to see warm night light*~~~
Friday, September 21, 2007
i can see whats happening
and they dont have a clue
they will fall in love
and our trio will be down to two
theres magic everywhere
with all these romantic atmosphere, disaster is in the air
cant you feel the love tonight
the world is living in perfect harmony
with all its living things
so many things to tell her
but how to make her see
the truth of my past but thats impossible
hes holding back
why wont he be the king he is
cant guess?
and they dont have a clue
they will fall in love
and our trio will be down to two
theres magic everywhere
with all these romantic atmosphere, disaster is in the air
cant you feel the love tonight
the world is living in perfect harmony
with all its living things
so many things to tell her
but how to make her see
the truth of my past but thats impossible
hes holding back
why wont he be the king he is
cant guess?
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
angel-devil
heehee
like me
an angel and a devil
that's what i wanna be
i'm gonna watch and see
how i turn out to be
an angel i'll always be
a devil i dream to be
oh let me see
these both in me
angel eyes and devil smile
for thee :)
-hee-
can you... see this in me?
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Cutest Ms Angie.
Don't you fret my darling.
This week u may be blue,
But next week you'll be smiling :)
IELTS of Seven
Is something you can get
As long as you believe in yourself
Nothing will be too bad :)
Testimonials from teachers
Will be easy peasy for you
They will say
Angie is an angel
Angie is kind but firm
Angie is a friend and teacher
of only the very best kind :)
So don't u give up dear
All these are but a challenge
We'll always be there behind you
Never doubt the nengken. :P
Wish i could write more
But lest the boss looks at me funny,
i'll have to stop now
and wish u the best u can be!
love lots
yindeh
heheeee
Don't you fret my darling.
This week u may be blue,
But next week you'll be smiling :)
IELTS of Seven
Is something you can get
As long as you believe in yourself
Nothing will be too bad :)
Testimonials from teachers
Will be easy peasy for you
They will say
Angie is an angel
Angie is kind but firm
Angie is a friend and teacher
of only the very best kind :)
So don't u give up dear
All these are but a challenge
We'll always be there behind you
Never doubt the nengken. :P
Wish i could write more
But lest the boss looks at me funny,
i'll have to stop now
and wish u the best u can be!
love lots
yindeh
heheeee
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
it's one of those BEAT BEAT days!! omg. i felt like lying flat on the ground, closing my eyes, not shutting my ears but not wanting to know what they're doing...just lay 'dead' in the state of ignorance! i felt like i was really gonna be craZY! this is too 'OVER' to add colours to my life, i donT need this!
anyways, 〈Just Like Heaven〉is sooo nice!! A part of my bday gift from yindeh one/two years back. haha. i finally watched it. two thumbs UP!! yo!
maybe i've been too 'generous' lately? what should i do? play 'pee-ka-boo'? play 'silence is golden'? play 'visible statue'? or just don't play anymore... ???
maybe i've been too 'generous' lately? what should i do? play 'pee-ka-boo'? play 'silence is golden'? play 'visible statue'? or just don't play anymore... ???
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Today i kept sneezing. and have a sore throat. i woke up 5am coz i dreamt of a friend's father dead and couldnt get back to sleep anymore. he wrote something really sweet to his family (in friendster?) (in 1980?) but had a child in 1986 and is still very alive now? this is too weird & incredible. however it still disturbs me. shit la. chinese saying: when u dream of someone dead, u're extending his/her life. dont let me be the one helping extending ppl's life anymore please. oh gosh.
i'm having a lazy day and was really glad when cb appeared as an offline onliner. it's the first time i ever see him staying up until this late, his 3am. and yup, for that reason he told me about :) this cb, always acting so cool, so manly, so brotherly, yet spontaneous, silly and jovial. cb can make ppl sometimes very geram, sometimes feeling stupid, sometimes offending you like nobody's business. but no doubt he's been there to cheer me up and make me feel better. he can get me to talk crap and total silly stuffs with him and talk about things which are so out of topic then suddenly jump back to the most formal topic ever again. seems like someone who expects you to read his complicated mind though. erm.
many things said are like still so intangible. we shall see :):)
i'm having a lazy day and was really glad when cb appeared as an offline onliner. it's the first time i ever see him staying up until this late, his 3am. and yup, for that reason he told me about :) this cb, always acting so cool, so manly, so brotherly, yet spontaneous, silly and jovial. cb can make ppl sometimes very geram, sometimes feeling stupid, sometimes offending you like nobody's business. but no doubt he's been there to cheer me up and make me feel better. he can get me to talk crap and total silly stuffs with him and talk about things which are so out of topic then suddenly jump back to the most formal topic ever again. seems like someone who expects you to read his complicated mind though. erm.
many things said are like still so intangible. we shall see :):)
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
what is the feeling when u get to know something that you dun feel like knowing? why do i accidentally get to know it? i wish things were simpler, and ppl dont make themselves complicated. be yourself. dont be someone you dont even know how to be. changes are sometimes interesting, but too big a change makes it odd. dont change the picture in my mind. i like it the way it used to be...
i find this camel story quite meaningful~~
so the MORAL of the story is:
Skills, knowledge, abilities and experiences
are only useful if
YOU ARE AT THE RIGHT PLACE!!
so where are you now?
and where am i now?
Monday, September 03, 2007
Today the toad was gonna talk about his childhood. As I was walking out to the bus-stop, suddenly I was thinking that I want to go back to Kenyalang to that long room of ours, with our daddy-made ping-pong table, the red & green carpets we used to skip about, the night-lamp we use to bully, our blankies that can be the roofs of our dollhouse, the long white table with 2 holes to stick in our legs, and the nice but hard-to-clean window which we can see half of kuching's view? miss all that =.= Only I remembered that our old sweet home has been banged down & turned into a new building already :( may our childhood memories stay there forever.
Today I took the bus 3times. 2times 21, and once 20. I used to hate getting 20 coz it's like nearly 21, so I think it's the worst luck. But this one is a nice number: 9911. well, it turned out quite a nice day :)
By the way, I want to know what the toad is thinking. Bombastic weirdo.
Today I took the bus 3times. 2times 21, and once 20. I used to hate getting 20 coz it's like nearly 21, so I think it's the worst luck. But this one is a nice number: 9911. well, it turned out quite a nice day :)
By the way, I want to know what the toad is thinking. Bombastic weirdo.
Monday, August 20, 2007
Post mortem of August 19. One year before angie knew.
my sis and i actually made a deal? to see how she, he & i will be doing after one year. well, it seems that we're all just doing fine, having our new adventurous stories and it just proves that all you need is TIME.
this date has actually like kind of been instilled in me, but it especially occurred like a month before. i was actually abit nervous, afraid to lose a good friend, afraid to feel the awkwardness between us. but this july the penang trip made me understand my "it" better. i love him as a really good friend, to that extent that i can actually feel that i'm treating him somehow differently, but inexplainable. in fact i feel that we could actually talk more about our true feelings now, rather than last time, always hiding it only to ourselves, feeling weird to share. It's like spending the entire day to plan what to say, but ended up talking about something else. what a failure! haha. Anyways, i hope this special friendship would last for a very very long time :)
Back to August 19. i was like 'oh mien, 19Aug!' when i got to know that we had 2 assignments and a presentation to do on this particular day! It was a tiring day, but it turned out to be a really great day! It's the first time we've ever seen Sam with such an enormous smile! "You've all done such a great job!" It just melts your heart, after staying up till 4am :) it's like NO MORE 'samophobia'!!! yeah!
It just seems that when there's nothing happening, really the whole day just lays flat; but when you have things happening, all day it comes. This so called CA person ruined some of my happiness. eeeew. why did he have to do that to himself?
next this MSL, i dunno what to say. it's a mystery knowing him, he's funny at times, overly concerned at times. but the thing is, it's like he's just too childish for his age. i feel like a very big sister, always giving him advice which i dunno works onot B-) gosh.
Talking about these, thanks to CB who really can brighten up my day! He works as a 'distraction' which is so called 'motivation'. and i really need that during my stressful days, haha. this is finally someone more worth looking forward to :) yindeh said we have chemistry? haha, CLICK!!
my sis and i actually made a deal? to see how she, he & i will be doing after one year. well, it seems that we're all just doing fine, having our new adventurous stories and it just proves that all you need is TIME.
this date has actually like kind of been instilled in me, but it especially occurred like a month before. i was actually abit nervous, afraid to lose a good friend, afraid to feel the awkwardness between us. but this july the penang trip made me understand my "it" better. i love him as a really good friend, to that extent that i can actually feel that i'm treating him somehow differently, but inexplainable. in fact i feel that we could actually talk more about our true feelings now, rather than last time, always hiding it only to ourselves, feeling weird to share. It's like spending the entire day to plan what to say, but ended up talking about something else. what a failure! haha. Anyways, i hope this special friendship would last for a very very long time :)
Back to August 19. i was like 'oh mien, 19Aug!' when i got to know that we had 2 assignments and a presentation to do on this particular day! It was a tiring day, but it turned out to be a really great day! It's the first time we've ever seen Sam with such an enormous smile! "You've all done such a great job!" It just melts your heart, after staying up till 4am :) it's like NO MORE 'samophobia'!!! yeah!
It just seems that when there's nothing happening, really the whole day just lays flat; but when you have things happening, all day it comes. This so called CA person ruined some of my happiness. eeeew. why did he have to do that to himself?
next this MSL, i dunno what to say. it's a mystery knowing him, he's funny at times, overly concerned at times. but the thing is, it's like he's just too childish for his age. i feel like a very big sister, always giving him advice which i dunno works onot B-) gosh.
Talking about these, thanks to CB who really can brighten up my day! He works as a 'distraction' which is so called 'motivation'. and i really need that during my stressful days, haha. this is finally someone more worth looking forward to :) yindeh said we have chemistry? haha, CLICK!!
Friday, August 10, 2007
Monday, August 06, 2007
I seem to have fate with 9. say some.
I was born on the 9th. daddy too. And that koko who became me?
There’re 9 family members staying in my house.
My first love was born on a 19th, and we broke off on a 19th. (fate? Haha)
Today I found out that distracting monster was born on a 29th. Top secret revealed :P silly.
My best girlfriend is born on the 9th month.
My passwords usually have 9.
Now I count,,,,
There’re 9 young people in my life I can really talk to currently:
ying, ben, yeh, kim, joo, xuan, yen, jac, chuong.
Haha crazy me.
but anyways, 9, 9, 9. like 9, like me!! Hahaha :D
I was born on the 9th. daddy too. And that koko who became me?
There’re 9 family members staying in my house.
My first love was born on a 19th, and we broke off on a 19th. (fate? Haha)
Today I found out that distracting monster was born on a 29th. Top secret revealed :P silly.
My best girlfriend is born on the 9th month.
My passwords usually have 9.
Now I count,,,,
There’re 9 young people in my life I can really talk to currently:
ying, ben, yeh, kim, joo, xuan, yen, jac, chuong.
Haha crazy me.
but anyways, 9, 9, 9. like 9, like me!! Hahaha :D
Sunday, August 05, 2007
I seem to meet a ‘mother’ everywhere! Haha. At home, I have my dearest mummy. When I first came KL, I had Jane, whom most ppl hate, but can see that she really cares for me. In college, I have ‘mummy’. And now at LCMH, I have Mrs. Teoh! She sees the silliest & cutest me, and I’ve seen hers too, haha. I respect her, but at the same time can be very friend with her, and sometimes we talk like mother and daughter. today we went for a talk together, and there’s ppl who asked if I’m her daughter & that we look alike! Omg. Alike I dun think so, but Mrs. Teoh was happy and so do I. haha. Good boss :)
Mexen’s birthday. She’s 21!! Happy like what having a huge cake from Eugene! Haha!
Received a postcard from Yen sent from Melbourne! Hoho!
Finally met YC online again. For weeks we’ve been leaving offline boring msgs, and it’s much nicer to really chat! I can’t believe I’m actually having this weird 暗爽 feeling in me, but it’s so long since I felt this way again. There’s like so many things to talk about, but thanks to him I failed to do my work. Distracting monster. A nice friend to talk to is indeed hard to find,,,
HAPPY :)
Mexen’s birthday. She’s 21!! Happy like what having a huge cake from Eugene! Haha!
Received a postcard from Yen sent from Melbourne! Hoho!
Finally met YC online again. For weeks we’ve been leaving offline boring msgs, and it’s much nicer to really chat! I can’t believe I’m actually having this weird 暗爽 feeling in me, but it’s so long since I felt this way again. There’s like so many things to talk about, but thanks to him I failed to do my work. Distracting monster. A nice friend to talk to is indeed hard to find,,,
HAPPY :)
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Oh mien, it’s like there’re so many things to write yet there’s like no time to write!! Sad. July is really eventful and of coz, BUSY. Busy with life, busy with work, busy with friends, busy enjoying, and busy finding time! Since the start of july I’m like fully occupied and did not even realise that july had gone! Wow!
I intended to keep the Penang trip a secret, but I told them too. Haha. It’s worse keeping secrets eh? With two guys who’re like my brothers now, sometimes feeling I’m elder like jaga-ing two big men, sometimes feeling I’m younger being protected by two tall bodyguards or maybe being stupider is one of them? Haha. (whereas I always feel that kimkim is my big sister, haha) anyhow, good aeroplanes, best buddies!! Talking about the Penang trip, it was adventurous, as we explored on our own, but it wasn’t super exciting. Most of the time we’re entertaining ourselves rather than the environment entertains us. hmm..heh… well, the memorable stuffs were our walking aimlessly but with directions, our crazy singings, our crap-talking, our laughters, our bubbling, our pillow talk, our snores, and of course our crave and desires for NICE PENANG FOOD. We concluded that Kuching food defeated Penang food. Haha yeah!
Happy Kuching’s Day. I wanna go to the food fest…
1st August.
Mummy said it started off bad. Sejiingkat’s office is flooded by 2 inches!!
Daddy would have to pay my rent again.
Dee has a mini crush? Hehe.
Ben is gonna pia very hard for dentistry. 2nd option, doctor?? No way!!
CJ & Rong --- erm, enjoy school life!!
Kim gonna start class, joo starting new life, yeh busy working.
Gie leh? Apu~ I need motivation to drive on!! eLP!!
I intended to keep the Penang trip a secret, but I told them too. Haha. It’s worse keeping secrets eh? With two guys who’re like my brothers now, sometimes feeling I’m elder like jaga-ing two big men, sometimes feeling I’m younger being protected by two tall bodyguards or maybe being stupider is one of them? Haha. (whereas I always feel that kimkim is my big sister, haha) anyhow, good aeroplanes, best buddies!! Talking about the Penang trip, it was adventurous, as we explored on our own, but it wasn’t super exciting. Most of the time we’re entertaining ourselves rather than the environment entertains us. hmm..heh… well, the memorable stuffs were our walking aimlessly but with directions, our crazy singings, our crap-talking, our laughters, our bubbling, our pillow talk, our snores, and of course our crave and desires for NICE PENANG FOOD. We concluded that Kuching food defeated Penang food. Haha yeah!
Happy Kuching’s Day. I wanna go to the food fest…
1st August.
Mummy said it started off bad. Sejiingkat’s office is flooded by 2 inches!!
Daddy would have to pay my rent again.
Dee has a mini crush? Hehe.
Ben is gonna pia very hard for dentistry. 2nd option, doctor?? No way!!
CJ & Rong --- erm, enjoy school life!!
Kim gonna start class, joo starting new life, yeh busy working.
Gie leh? Apu~ I need motivation to drive on!! eLP!!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
my dear Yew Juin...
can you please stop giving me an emotional breakdown? You always cause me feeling so sorry when it's not really my fault but half my fault. i was so sorry but it was hard for me to apologize to her. i felt so bad :( how could you be so fast? it's just a few seconds i'm away! you cause a foebia in me, seeing you around. you won't know how cute you looked when you first came, the two of you with bald heads, looking totally identical, talking in your own world in your own languages. i got to know you both were ADHD and what an exposure i have! i spent 2weeks to observe you two and really sat down to just look at both of you. and i managed to finally identify both of you. nobody at school can identify you both yet, i feel proud to say so. but now i know, you both look so different!
you really can drive me crazy! i bit my lips so many times because i was so frustrated at that time and i couldn't hit you. i quietly scolded you "bulldog" in my heart, making use of the effective word CJ taught us. when you climbed the piano and stood up there singing so happily, i nearly died of heart attack. when you messed up the whole place and get me to grab the wriggly you to pack up my muscles grew by a few inches. when i see you putting everything in your mouth i nearly vomitted. when you peed and pooed at first i felt like spanking you. when you bit my butt my finger and my thigh, i nearly felt like strangling you. how can you just bite so easily? you just cant control!! but i've seen you tried and i know how much effort you've put to control that. you';re a total opposite of me here. i felt so much like biting that someone once last year, but i had too much self-control. i just couldn't put my teeth together to bite that flesh! sometimes i wish i was more spontaneous like you. but please...please...please...work hard!! we'll help you all we can.
however with all your mischieve, you always melt my heart in so many ways!! i wonder i'm really that soft, but i don't feel so. you're all just so special. you melted my heart when you suddenly come and hug me. you gave me a really wet kiss when we sang the song! you suddenly jumped on my back and nearly strangled me. you pulled my hand to see what you have made, i can't understand, but will appreciate it. you made me so happy when you suddenly speaked something out without knowing it yourself! i was so amazed when i actually heard you singing for the first time! the way you looked at me when i washed your hands. the way you said bye-bye like an adult in a manly voice. the longest 2minutes you managed to sit on my lap, singing and dancing with me. you looked at me for no reason and suddenly run and jumped up to just hug me so tight! how did you do that jump?! i fell down but was laughing out really loud. you monster.
whatever, monster. please just control...for the sake of a bumblebee...i love you...
can you please stop giving me an emotional breakdown? You always cause me feeling so sorry when it's not really my fault but half my fault. i was so sorry but it was hard for me to apologize to her. i felt so bad :( how could you be so fast? it's just a few seconds i'm away! you cause a foebia in me, seeing you around. you won't know how cute you looked when you first came, the two of you with bald heads, looking totally identical, talking in your own world in your own languages. i got to know you both were ADHD and what an exposure i have! i spent 2weeks to observe you two and really sat down to just look at both of you. and i managed to finally identify both of you. nobody at school can identify you both yet, i feel proud to say so. but now i know, you both look so different!
you really can drive me crazy! i bit my lips so many times because i was so frustrated at that time and i couldn't hit you. i quietly scolded you "bulldog" in my heart, making use of the effective word CJ taught us. when you climbed the piano and stood up there singing so happily, i nearly died of heart attack. when you messed up the whole place and get me to grab the wriggly you to pack up my muscles grew by a few inches. when i see you putting everything in your mouth i nearly vomitted. when you peed and pooed at first i felt like spanking you. when you bit my butt my finger and my thigh, i nearly felt like strangling you. how can you just bite so easily? you just cant control!! but i've seen you tried and i know how much effort you've put to control that. you';re a total opposite of me here. i felt so much like biting that someone once last year, but i had too much self-control. i just couldn't put my teeth together to bite that flesh! sometimes i wish i was more spontaneous like you. but please...please...please...work hard!! we'll help you all we can.
however with all your mischieve, you always melt my heart in so many ways!! i wonder i'm really that soft, but i don't feel so. you're all just so special. you melted my heart when you suddenly come and hug me. you gave me a really wet kiss when we sang the song! you suddenly jumped on my back and nearly strangled me. you pulled my hand to see what you have made, i can't understand, but will appreciate it. you made me so happy when you suddenly speaked something out without knowing it yourself! i was so amazed when i actually heard you singing for the first time! the way you looked at me when i washed your hands. the way you said bye-bye like an adult in a manly voice. the longest 2minutes you managed to sit on my lap, singing and dancing with me. you looked at me for no reason and suddenly run and jumped up to just hug me so tight! how did you do that jump?! i fell down but was laughing out really loud. you monster.
whatever, monster. please just control...for the sake of a bumblebee...i love you...
Monday, July 16, 2007
hmm...it's a nightmare for a person to remember you because once long time ago you dropped your bun on the floor and that person saw you pick it up and peel off the skin and eat the bun? thank god i did not blow it and eat it! mien, what a nightmare! well, it's nice having ppl to look forward to while chatting on msn. so far i have 7. it's just the happy feeling when you see them online, no matter you're actually chatting, or talking crap, or just having "the silence"...hah...
suddenly there's so much work to do...house, college, work, mind, friends... i'm starting to feel breathless... and i'm actually starting my individual & group assignments, and my piling reports!! and plannign ahead for arts & crafts for the children. and my lessons. and plans to release catharsis. at these times, i always think of the beach, and somewhere i can shout out really loud. i dreamt of myself crying last night, how stupid. but again, i dunno what's the reason. issit that it's so hard for me to cry that i had to express it in my dreams? that'd be so pathetic!! just cry it out, baby! BUT HOW?!
oh, help me help me...
suddenly there's so much work to do...house, college, work, mind, friends... i'm starting to feel breathless... and i'm actually starting my individual & group assignments, and my piling reports!! and plannign ahead for arts & crafts for the children. and my lessons. and plans to release catharsis. at these times, i always think of the beach, and somewhere i can shout out really loud. i dreamt of myself crying last night, how stupid. but again, i dunno what's the reason. issit that it's so hard for me to cry that i had to express it in my dreams? that'd be so pathetic!! just cry it out, baby! BUT HOW?!
oh, help me help me...
Monday, July 09, 2007
okie here i am with my busy life again. The first day of college was like: I'm a student again!! How nice!! and having carmen as your lecturer is really fun :) somemore i had my OAD results, Sam's paper!! everyone's nightmare...but incredibly i had an A+!! and it's my first A+ in Dika!! mien, how excited. how happy. how glad. how amazing! how...(whatever...all the good words you can put in now! haha) in a day, i had KimGary, Kenny Rogers & Asia Cafe's famous Lala & Clam!! wowh! bloated. and it's 070707. most ppl say 7 is a very good number. a good day for me though!
and today. gosh, elp!! we're having Sam again this sem. bored, bored, bored. i actually slept in class after the lunch hour. i tried to open my eyes but...I REALLY TRIED. the thing is, i'm sitting right in front of Sam. this sem both classes we had are small classes, consisting only the 10 of us! so duhh, damn obvious, Angie is dozing off. when i finally stared at the screen in front, she said, "you guys want a break?" i know it's tiring esp after lunch. you also know!! but thanx for indirectly referring to me. haha. sorry la.
tonite i get to online. at home! haha. thanx to FengHui actually. bcoz of her, i got to know my other 2 china housemates better. we went out for the great movie together, went shopping & ate together. i was with them, and realised that i had a little china slang when talking to them too. are our tongues so flexible? they said i speak my chinese well. HAHA. really?? they said it's hard to communicate with West M'sians. said they always cant understand. HAHA. thanx to CHMS1 then :) how i miss my old school days!!
got back in touch with an old primary classmate. he said suddenly felt like finding old frens. but how come i'm the first he found? haha. CJ gave my number without asking who he is! what a brother! he remembers me as "the family girl". wow. and all i can recall is his plump body and his name which is read differently in chinese & english. but he described himself as "i was on the heavy side before." interesting way to say it! hehe. nice feeling finding back so called "forgotten" friends. okies for now!
and today. gosh, elp!! we're having Sam again this sem. bored, bored, bored. i actually slept in class after the lunch hour. i tried to open my eyes but...I REALLY TRIED. the thing is, i'm sitting right in front of Sam. this sem both classes we had are small classes, consisting only the 10 of us! so duhh, damn obvious, Angie is dozing off. when i finally stared at the screen in front, she said, "you guys want a break?" i know it's tiring esp after lunch. you also know!! but thanx for indirectly referring to me. haha. sorry la.
tonite i get to online. at home! haha. thanx to FengHui actually. bcoz of her, i got to know my other 2 china housemates better. we went out for the great movie
got back in touch with an old primary classmate. he said suddenly felt like finding old frens. but how come i'm the first he found? haha. CJ gave my number without asking who he is! what a brother! he remembers me as "the family girl". wow. and all i can recall is his plump body and his name which is read differently in chinese & english. but he described himself as "i was on the heavy side before." interesting way to say it! hehe. nice feeling finding back so called "forgotten" friends. okies for now!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
看男人，哈哈:D
这个星期搭巴士搭火车走路都不小心的观察到男人，完了。
可是那天就够衰了，火车很挤，那男的站我前面，脸还长得可以，衣服还可说称。看到他的包包，哇，形象跌了三分之一！要学潮流却学得这么失败！最惨的是，忽然他的手提了起来，天啊！股沟给我看到一半了！！差点晕到！真够丑啊，何必这样？裤子穿这么松，裤袋掉到大腿那，一点也不好看啦先生！
去健身房路程满长的，睡着了。巴士下来走上楼梯就一个男的拦住我，说了几句话，后来听到的就只有“你没有吓到吗？”“人家刚睡醒咧，先生。”后来继续说了几句话。他是做慈善帮那些尿失禁的。平时都不喜欢以这种方式做慈善的，竟然捐了RM10！算他魅力够好了，嘻嘻。不过那天是满开心的，睡醒有人都你笑，哈哈。笨笨的。
又一天回家路上巴士挤满人了。被挤到两个男人旁边。后来发现它们是一对的。一看就知道一个比较主动，一个比较被动。观察了几次都发现主动的那个长相比较看得出，而且是扮演男的角色；被动那个呢，长相都跟别的男人没什么两样，只是比较有女孩的心灵吧。他们有点含蓄的，却没有特别在意别人的眼光。说真的，很佩服他们的勇气。一路上他们就在我旁边，看他们也挺幸福的，至少他们都有彼此，不寂寞。我也跟着微笑了。又是傻傻的自己笑。
还有一天，在我旁边的旁边坐着一个红衣男人。恶心到不知该怎么说，他在floss 牙齿！那就算了，他还拿来嗅呢！没骗你，我当场鸡皮疙瘩！gelik死了啦！
有看到一对小情侣，看样子初二初三吧。“到家打电话给我。”小小就有电话，电话打来还接的有模有样！哈哈，现在的人越来越厉害了。祝福你们吧：）
回家时下着大雨，自然地手大部分是遮着头的吧。这男人却盖着双耳跑！我在后面有一点想笑。很坏吧？
可是那天就够衰了，火车很挤，那男的站我前面，脸还长得可以，衣服还可说称。看到他的包包，哇，形象跌了三分之一！要学潮流却学得这么失败！最惨的是，忽然他的手提了起来，天啊！股沟给我看到一半了！！差点晕到！真够丑啊，何必这样？裤子穿这么松，裤袋掉到大腿那，一点也不好看啦先生！
去健身房路程满长的，睡着了。巴士下来走上楼梯就一个男的拦住我，说了几句话，后来听到的就只有“你没有吓到吗？”“人家刚睡醒咧，先生。”后来继续说了几句话。他是做慈善帮那些尿失禁的。平时都不喜欢以这种方式做慈善的，竟然捐了RM10！算他魅力够好了，嘻嘻。不过那天是满开心的，睡醒有人都你笑，哈哈。笨笨的。
又一天回家路上巴士挤满人了。被挤到两个男人旁边。后来发现它们是一对的。一看就知道一个比较主动，一个比较被动。观察了几次都发现主动的那个长相比较看得出，而且是扮演男的角色；被动那个呢，长相都跟别的男人没什么两样，只是比较有女孩的心灵吧。他们有点含蓄的，却没有特别在意别人的眼光。说真的，很佩服他们的勇气。一路上他们就在我旁边，看他们也挺幸福的，至少他们都有彼此，不寂寞。我也跟着微笑了。又是傻傻的自己笑。
还有一天，在我旁边的旁边坐着一个红衣男人。恶心到不知该怎么说，他在floss 牙齿！那就算了，他还拿来嗅呢！没骗你，我当场鸡皮疙瘩！gelik死了啦！
有看到一对小情侣，看样子初二初三吧。“到家打电话给我。”小小就有电话，电话打来还接的有模有样！哈哈，现在的人越来越厉害了。祝福你们吧：）
回家时下着大雨，自然地手大部分是遮着头的吧。这男人却盖着双耳跑！我在后面有一点想笑。很坏吧？
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
又回到了这个不温暖的家。这几天，又要想念古晋的家了。
假期两个星期其实没做到什么，就真是尽情的吃喝玩乐追连续剧！值得赞赏的就只有我们突如其来的运动精神吧！有人一起跑步一起游泳感觉好幸福，虽然跑到一半就各跑各的了，虽然游泳喝到水还被宗英射水进我鼻子痛到要死想杀了他，但总比这里好，不用一个人搭远路去健身房，然后运动爽了又要搭那永远都挤满人的巴士回家。天色暗了还会心跳加速，一路上念着太子爷包庇。
回家的时候，曾经用多么多爱心苛护的心叶小树死掉了。它在那瘦瘦高高的透明杯子里证明了它四年多以来的强大生命力，努力传宗接代，生出好多个小小的可爱的小心叶。而我们呢，却还在爱情中摇摆不定。打开那蓝色的盒子，藏着很多小礼物和一些不知为什么会收的奇怪小东西。这些，应该就是初恋才会做的事情吧，哈哈，笨笨又单纯的甜蜜。这些都是以后想叙叙旧时的美丽回忆，把他们压到心里边的一个小小角落。
现在杯子时空的，留着的只有里面九、十颗小石头。因为习惯了它的存在，那天看到它死掉是有一点点的心痛。姐和我决定再找一棵，不要弥补过去，要创造新的未来！
假期两个星期其实没做到什么，就真是尽情的吃喝玩乐追连续剧！值得赞赏的就只有我们突如其来的运动精神吧！有人一起跑步一起游泳感觉好幸福，虽然跑到一半就各跑各的了，虽然游泳喝到水还被宗英射水进我鼻子痛到要死想杀了他，但总比这里好，不用一个人搭远路去健身房，然后运动爽了又要搭那永远都挤满人的巴士回家。天色暗了还会心跳加速，一路上念着太子爷包庇。
回家的时候，曾经用多么多爱心苛护的心叶小树死掉了。它在那瘦瘦高高的透明杯子里证明了它四年多以来的强大生命力，努力传宗接代，生出好多个小小的可爱的小心叶。而我们呢，却还在爱情中摇摆不定。打开那蓝色的盒子，藏着很多小礼物和一些不知为什么会收的奇怪小东西。这些，应该就是初恋才会做的事情吧，哈哈，笨笨又单纯的甜蜜。这些都是以后想叙叙旧时的美丽回忆，把他们压到心里边的一个小小角落。
现在杯子时空的，留着的只有里面九、十颗小石头。因为习惯了它的存在，那天看到它死掉是有一点点的心痛。姐和我决定再找一棵，不要弥补过去，要创造新的未来！
Thursday, May 31, 2007
people are unfair. how come those popular bunch of ppl can do anything they like and nobody will say anything? and we this bunch of ppl so humble so honest yet let ppl gossip?! it doesn't make sense!! i should say they are the 'exterior people' and we are the 'interior people'. the word 'feelings' is not in their dictionary. use your brains before you talk!! useless people #_# grrrR!
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
五月中凹谷
这几天情绪都很不稳定, 不知道主要原因是什么.
那个让我很烦的事不提了,烦烦烦!
那天深夜里,看了戏很累却没去睡觉,反而又开始近年来无聊就做的事情:看照片.几乎每一张照片,我都可以记得一小段故事.傻傻的对着那些照片发呆大约一小时,竟然还想把他们印出来!选了四张照片,就这么印出来,又继续发呆至少二十分钟吧.爸妈甜蜜笑容一张,我们五个青山岩一张,我们四个很开心的跟飞机棋玩拍照游戏,还有我跟璇的宵夜照.看来这几个人会是我永远最最想念最最珍惜的人吧.自从以前到现在,很多东西很多故事我就只留给自己,这样好吗?希望有一天可以说出来,即使都没意义了,但应该很多都是很好笑的笑话吧.偶尔回忆当年的自己感觉还真不错!谁会是我的幸运听众呢?
那晚我的一句"我不敢当",狠狠地打发掉一个关心我的人.他努力了三次,这次应该真的明白吧.维可说这个人已成功在我这留下了一些脚印,认识的开始也都这么莫名其妙!这个人太奇怪了,我的思想都够单纯了,大我六七岁的人还能比我更单纯阿?谈过恋爱九年的人,好像都还不懂什么叫做爱情.真幼稚.以后想起那种让人想呕又令人一点都不心动的撒娇声应该会很好笑吧.二十一岁,认识神经病的人,有神经病的体验.现在聊天就真的无聊了,之前还可以每天骂他笨,爽爽就不理人.我呢,学会耍人了!!成功的开始!
我认识的好女朋友好像都很强.除了姐跟晶,应该是我同类吧.她们好像都会帮我跟人算帐.初中变态菱够强,高中笑气姿够强,college四个都强,艳,璇也很强.我很老爷啊,无奈.跟他们在一起,总是觉得他们很大姐,而我只是一个笨蛋妹妹.不过曾经在college拜五晚上我缺席了,下课后那几个连续打来跟我说的话,感动了.让我觉得自己在某些方面呢,也很大姐吧!哈哈.只是她们的是显性,而我的是隐性的.
有人告诉我说没有爱情就活不下去了,这么惨吗?我都活过来了嘛,呵呵.只是可能因为曾经爱过了,所以难免偶尔觉得很渴吧...渴望爱一个人,渴望被一个人爱.爱情这么伤,不过还是想再次陷入爱情网里边.不怕死.有人说要找一个爱你比你爱他多的人,但自己没有很爱很爱他又有什么用咧?爱情有没有可能爱得平等?爱情很笨蛋.爱情也让人笨蛋.但世界上几乎每个人都喜欢做笨蛋!!
已经好一段时间没自己吃过了,今晚又要自己吃.我,开始想家了.每次倒数回家期间都特别想家的bo...
那个让我很烦的事不提了,烦烦烦!
那天深夜里,看了戏很累却没去睡觉,反而又开始近年来无聊就做的事情:看照片.几乎每一张照片,我都可以记得一小段故事.傻傻的对着那些照片发呆大约一小时,竟然还想把他们印出来!选了四张照片,就这么印出来,又继续发呆至少二十分钟吧.爸妈甜蜜笑容一张,我们五个青山岩一张,我们四个很开心的跟飞机棋玩拍照游戏,还有我跟璇的宵夜照.看来这几个人会是我永远最最想念最最珍惜的人吧.自从以前到现在,很多东西很多故事我就只留给自己,这样好吗?希望有一天可以说出来,即使都没意义了,但应该很多都是很好笑的笑话吧.偶尔回忆当年的自己感觉还真不错!谁会是我的幸运听众呢?
那晚我的一句"我不敢当",狠狠地打发掉一个关心我的人.他努力了三次,这次应该真的明白吧.维可说这个人已成功在我这留下了一些脚印,认识的开始也都这么莫名其妙!这个人太奇怪了,我的思想都够单纯了,大我六七岁的人还能比我更单纯阿?谈过恋爱九年的人,好像都还不懂什么叫做爱情.真幼稚.以后想起那种让人想呕又令人一点都不心动的撒娇声应该会很好笑吧.二十一岁,认识神经病的人,有神经病的体验.现在聊天就真的无聊了,之前还可以每天骂他笨,爽爽就不理人.我呢,学会耍人了!!成功的开始!
我认识的好女朋友好像都很强.除了姐跟晶,应该是我同类吧.她们好像都会帮我跟人算帐.初中变态菱够强,高中笑气姿够强,college四个都强,艳,璇也很强.我很老爷啊,无奈.跟他们在一起,总是觉得他们很大姐,而我只是一个笨蛋妹妹.不过曾经在college拜五晚上我缺席了,下课后那几个连续打来跟我说的话,感动了.让我觉得自己在某些方面呢,也很大姐吧!哈哈.只是她们的是显性,而我的是隐性的.
有人告诉我说没有爱情就活不下去了,这么惨吗?我都活过来了嘛,呵呵.只是可能因为曾经爱过了,所以难免偶尔觉得很渴吧...渴望爱一个人,渴望被一个人爱.爱情这么伤,不过还是想再次陷入爱情网里边.不怕死.有人说要找一个爱你比你爱他多的人,但自己没有很爱很爱他又有什么用咧?爱情有没有可能爱得平等?爱情很笨蛋.爱情也让人笨蛋.但世界上几乎每个人都喜欢做笨蛋!!
已经好一段时间没自己吃过了,今晚又要自己吃.我,开始想家了.每次倒数回家期间都特别想家的bo...
Monday, April 30, 2007
誰了解 ?
跟妈咪聊天。
一直以来，爸妈都不了解我到底在念什么。（伤心）
总是以为我以后要开幼儿园。（我却一点也没那种兴趣或志愿）
念的就只是怎样教书？（那干脆不念了）
做的作业报告只关于如何教书？（那就不用总是熬夜这么痛苦了）
考试成绩好像都不重要。（虽然要等四个月，拿到信封每次都急死）
跟很多人一样，有‘那种’想法。（我都懒得解释了，要怎么想就怎么想吧）
幼教不只是幼教。（这，只有我们才懂吧）
我不埋怨。（不过明明就在埋怨）
我知道我不是让爸妈骄傲的女儿。（不过我真的尽力了）
你不想伤害我，但我听得出，也感觉得到。（哭了）
其实我真正要念的并不是‘幼教’，而是儿童心理学里边的某个专科。（不过大马没供应，我没其他选择）
我还在努力找寻自己要走的路。（好像很难，要考虑很多方面，很烦。要勇敢，要加油。敢敢向前！）
高三毕业后，我应该跨对了这一步吧。（这只是开始，再给我力量！）
简单一点就好，为什么要这么不正常？
一直以来，爸妈都不了解我到底在念什么。（伤心）
总是以为我以后要开幼儿园。（我却一点也没那种兴趣或志愿）
念的就只是怎样教书？（那干脆不念了）
做的作业报告只关于如何教书？（那就不用总是熬夜这么痛苦了）
考试成绩好像都不重要。（虽然要等四个月，拿到信封每次都急死）
跟很多人一样，有‘那种’想法。（我都懒得解释了，要怎么想就怎么想吧）
幼教不只是幼教。（这，只有我们才懂吧）
我不埋怨。（不过明明就在埋怨）
我知道我不是让爸妈骄傲的女儿。（不过我真的尽力了）
你不想伤害我，但我听得出，也感觉得到。（哭了）
其实我真正要念的并不是‘幼教’，而是儿童心理学里边的某个专科。（不过大马没供应，我没其他选择）
我还在努力找寻自己要走的路。（好像很难，要考虑很多方面，很烦。要勇敢，要加油。敢敢向前！）
高三毕业后，我应该跨对了这一步吧。（这只是开始，再给我力量！）
简单一点就好，为什么要这么不正常？
Sunday, April 29, 2007
updates updates! i took leave to Genting with dearest yindeh...having to see my boss' long green papaya face. but who cares, haha. it's really time to release catharsis as i feel so stressed up in that little room of mine! well, it was kinda quiet, just the 2 of us...but we had a really great time screaming! haha. and thanx to yindeh who persuaded me to have a ride on the SPACE SHOT, omg. i still can't believe i actually went on that. but thanx for trying the Flume Ride with me..teehee! muaks~
back from Genting, workLOADS! deadmeat. but the 2 exams were ok after all, haha. and i managed to pass up my assignmt at 4pm sharp today! kena scolded by Devi, blebleble..hahaha...so what...her responsibility to keep the assgnmts leh! at least i handed in on time! feel so great. although there's one more last task to accomplish before i can truly fly!
My mind is already drifting to many many places...Gawai holidays family trip...then July trip with Joo & Yeh...August trip to grab ppl gok...or pending trip to Kuantan with Eugenia them...dates with Mexen...date with Cindy...date with YinRu, date with WaiLing...Saji, Christie...and the great trip to Taiwan?? and and and... wowH... thinking of it already soooooo FUN!!
back from Genting, workLOADS! deadmeat. but the 2 exams were ok after all, haha. and i managed to pass up my assignmt at 4pm sharp today! kena scolded by Devi, blebleble..hahaha...so what...her responsibility to keep the assgnmts leh! at least i handed in on time! feel so great. although there's one more last task to accomplish before i can truly fly!
My mind is already drifting to many many places...Gawai holidays family trip...then July trip with Joo & Yeh...August trip to grab ppl gok...or pending trip to Kuantan with Eugenia them...dates with Mexen...date with Cindy...date with YinRu, date with WaiLing...Saji, Christie...and the great trip to Taiwan?? and and and... wowH... thinking of it already soooooo FUN!!
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Bits n bits i've written this apriL... about NOW and THE PAST!
I used to take the longest time to finish a MENTOS chewy dragee in my mouth during high school, now I chew it just like them! Dunno how I can let it stay in my mouth so long last time!
I don't ever sleep, or even lie on my bed after a day out or if my body is just a little bit sticky or stinky! But this year I started laying my PVC mat to avoid direct contact. Now I can't bother. The sleeping mood just comes...and plop! There goes my stinky body on my bed!
I used to 想念，now I just 怀念。I dunno if it has a difference or whether it makes sense, but I do feel this way. And i INSIST, these two terms ARE different. (although they both means 'miss' in English. Ah, whatever.)
I used to be so the very quiet when I'm with strangerS, or just say friend's friends, now I'm a better chatterbox, or at least I can fit in. however it's only with ppl I feel comfortable with. Not my type means not my type, no interest to talk pun then.
I used to be so so 'humble' with bad words, now I spill out nia. But really, just once in awhile, when I'm really frustrated. Or sometimes for fun :P
I used to be very dependent on others, now I'm very independent, and I feel some ppl are dependent on me instead. No choice I guess. So I always go home to seek 'memory', to be a baby at home, pampered by those adults, and yindeh, forever. Haha.
I would never ever eat myself outside or go shopping on my own! But now I do, eating alone outside is simply just another tragedy in life. but shopping alone is FUN at times! Heh. Tend to buy more things actually.
I used to make myself forget the stuffs I like in the mall if it's considered expensive. Now I buy stuffs that I like, as long as it's not overly expensive. Though not worth the price, I still buy. Hoho. But after 2-3 times appreciating la... let money fly...
And something cheeky just to end it...heeh... I used to never think guys are handsome, really... but NOW...hehe..hohho.. they are somewhere around, OUT THERE!! cheers for the 'GREAT IMPROVEMENT'!! hoh.
I don't ever sleep, or even lie on my bed after a day out or if my body is just a little bit sticky or stinky! But this year I started laying my PVC mat to avoid direct contact. Now I can't bother. The sleeping mood just comes...and plop! There goes my stinky body on my bed!
I used to 想念，now I just 怀念。I dunno if it has a difference or whether it makes sense, but I do feel this way. And i INSIST, these two terms ARE different. (although they both means 'miss' in English. Ah, whatever.)
I used to be so the very quiet when I'm with strangerS, or just say friend's friends, now I'm a better chatterbox, or at least I can fit in. however it's only with ppl I feel comfortable with. Not my type means not my type, no interest to talk pun then.
I used to be so so 'humble' with bad words, now I spill out nia. But really, just once in awhile, when I'm really frustrated. Or sometimes for fun :P
I used to be very dependent on others, now I'm very independent, and I feel some ppl are dependent on me instead. No choice I guess. So I always go home to seek 'memory', to be a baby at home, pampered by those adults, and yindeh, forever. Haha.
I would never ever eat myself outside or go shopping on my own! But now I do, eating alone outside is simply just another tragedy in life. but shopping alone is FUN at times! Heh. Tend to buy more things actually.
I used to make myself forget the stuffs I like in the mall if it's considered expensive. Now I buy stuffs that I like, as long as it's not overly expensive. Though not worth the price, I still buy. Hoho. But after 2-3 times appreciating la... let money fly...
And something cheeky just to end it...heeh... I used to never think guys are handsome, really... but NOW...hehe..hohho.. they are somewhere around, OUT THERE!! cheers for the 'GREAT IMPROVEMENT'!! hoh.
Friday, April 20, 2007
Thursday, April 12, 2007
i wish i was simpleR!!
Mama's bday today, but she seems to have is “烦syndrome” every year on this day. Why wor? Mama always too stressed. Daddy called and asked me all about studying in Aussie. I'm so NOT SURE about everything. starting to be 烦 again. I really dunno wat I wanna study yet. Dun feel like taking education...but how to tell...but if I take others, dunno need study how long…dad said need tell him so he can count how much he can afford... ying ying... I wish I was simpler... like nobody understands. only talked to my boss about this. She asked me to specify in dealing Dyslexics. Good field and won't get crazy. Unlike always with Autistics will need to be normalized myself. And other fields I haven't surveyed yet also. I dowan to only stay at ECE wor. Phychology would be too wide a field, so I need to choose to specify in one or two. I'm still blur. I still don't know where I'm going. Feel so lost. How wor? Seems like I don't have direction. ishh, why so san-fu interested in such a course?!
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Birthday moods, haha
10/4/2007 1:30am
Hoho, my 20 is expired!! Happy twenty-one giegie :)
So my birthday wasn’t that pathetic after all, haha. But having low expectations sometimes really better. Hehe. Happy happy.
Thanx to ying & mexen for your “zhao-sia” bday song. But love it.
Thanx to Bendie. Thanx to Daddy. Thanx to Mummy.
Thanx to Rong for the special angpao card. Thanx to CJ.(for fun, cannot leave out)
Thanx to boss. Thanx to Su. Thanx to kids, esp Yew Shwin & Zheng Yi & Afiq.
Thanx to all friendster friends.
Thanx to all msn friends.
Thanx to so the many sms friends. And caller friends & relatives. And weird friends. Haha. Oh ya, and thanx to DiGi for the reload bonus!
Thanx to Wang (and his friends) & YL & Eugenia for inviting.
Thanx to FengHui.
Thanx to kimkim for casting the spell.
Thanx to yehyeh & joojoo.
SuRRprises aLL the way…hohoho. Gotta sleep for reaL. Sweetdreams.
10/4/2007 11:07pm
Got a card from Edwin, and a silver rose brooch too. Wowh. And a big hug. Awww~~
And a sweet pink baby Tupperware tumbler from Alif with 3 Ferrero Roche in it.
I finally visited the gym again. Haha. And went shopping again too. Today I enjoyed time alone. Heh, really. Juz the time when all phones are put silent, and you just swing and walk on your own…enjoying your own sweet time. Until I forgot time to go home…aiyo…then see the dark dark sky and the black black ppl. Scary mien. Then no bus coming for so long!! In the afternoon after work when I went, I slept in the bus and luckily woke up right 2 stops before. I tot I miss MV liao. Wowh. Experiences in buses…loads mien!!
Hoho, my 20 is expired!! Happy twenty-one giegie :)
So my birthday wasn’t that pathetic after all, haha. But having low expectations sometimes really better. Hehe. Happy happy.
Thanx to ying & mexen for your “zhao-sia” bday song. But love it.
Thanx to Bendie. Thanx to Daddy. Thanx to Mummy.
Thanx to Rong for the special angpao card. Thanx to CJ.(for fun, cannot leave out)
Thanx to boss. Thanx to Su. Thanx to kids, esp Yew Shwin & Zheng Yi & Afiq.
Thanx to all friendster friends.
Thanx to all msn friends.
Thanx to so the many sms friends. And caller friends & relatives. And weird friends. Haha. Oh ya, and thanx to DiGi for the reload bonus!
Thanx to Wang (and his friends) & YL & Eugenia for inviting.
Thanx to FengHui.
Thanx to kimkim for casting the spell.
Thanx to yehyeh & joojoo.
SuRRprises aLL the way…hohoho. Gotta sleep for reaL. Sweetdreams.
10/4/2007 11:07pm
Got a card from Edwin, and a silver rose brooch too. Wowh. And a big hug. Awww~~
And a sweet pink baby Tupperware tumbler from Alif with 3 Ferrero Roche in it.
I finally visited the gym again. Haha. And went shopping again too. Today I enjoyed time alone. Heh, really. Juz the time when all phones are put silent, and you just swing and walk on your own…enjoying your own sweet time. Until I forgot time to go home…aiyo…then see the dark dark sky and the black black ppl. Scary mien. Then no bus coming for so long!! In the afternoon after work when I went, I slept in the bus and luckily woke up right 2 stops before. I tot I miss MV liao. Wowh. Experiences in buses…loads mien!!
Monday, April 09, 2007
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
今天在外面连吃了两餐寂寞餐。看着别人不是一整大群的，就是一对一对的，连自己都觉得自己很可怜。生活不知算充实或充忙...感觉上好像很多朋友，可是能在身边的却时常没半个。昨晚跟jenj聊，还说羡慕我很多很多东西。我有什么值得羡慕啊？这世上幸亏有电脑和电话。每天电脑就是我的最佳良伴，而电话呢，听到熟悉的信息声或电话铃声就会感觉很好，会猜是谁打来的。有时会有意外惊喜！然后就会兴奋到傻傻一阵子。哈哈。电话一整天没响的话，就会莫名的感到无聊。想象chris假如近期内忽然打过来，我会爱上他的。哈哈，做梦啦。陌生良呢，对不起。是不是在我找到适合对象前，曾经辜负几个人就要被几个人辜负啊？那就很惨咯。我要等到何年何月何日啊？干脆当老处女咯！不要不要啊！今年过年衣包包等很多都不知不觉买到粉红的，姿说我渴望爱情。我有吗？不知道。可能吧。爱过了就会总是很渴吧。可是一定要坚持找对人......我要幸福：）
Sunday, April 01, 2007
My April
What a start. Starting my April with pia-ing assignment. Blah. But got the chance to read lots interesting stuffs too. April always starts off with a day to fool, a day to pray, days to plan for daddy and mummy's birthday, then enjoy my birthday, and feeling a little bit more matured, and... let's see what's next! haha. Anyways, yeah! I'm coming to 21! I just feel that 21 would be a better year compared to 20. It sounds nicer too! Though I think this year there'd be fewer surprises than last year. And it's a Monday. Monday blues eh? Haha, I'll get my kids to entertain me at least. All will have to give me a juicy saliva kiss! Haha, but on the cheek! Heeho ^o^ My April it will be. Have a nice one!!
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
March's HAPPENING!
14/3/2007 11:18pm
Tonite very no mood la. And got minor flu pula. Was so high in sbux today. So hardworking and busy but fun. And got good to talk to punya leng zhai supervisor to work with gok. But why after dinner suddenly so no mood one. Thinking of so many things one. Even little little wishes I expected cannot come true. i never asked much. Everything should just be simple. Why so complicated. What should I do. homework also piling. Due liao but still so lenggang. Wat happen. The old me shud be panicking. This me like not bothered. Tmr tmr n tmr. i’m a piece of deadmeat. Is it like wat yaya said, she once lost direction dunno wat she wanted. Then she watched a series and found her way again. Me leh? I know what I want. But I dunno what I REALLY want. Mao dun. Mao dun. Mao dun. Life is like all jumbled up. But thinking back, what is life if it is a monotonous one? Should I decide my life, or let time decide my life? Should I take risks, or let risks take over me? Should I accept love, or let love bury me? Should I be the opened up me, or the closed up me? But which one am i? oh……
15/3/2007 11:59pm
妈妈第一次叫我睡迟一点？每次都骂我这么爱睡！
哎哟，恋家恋友恋情周。怎么又来了？
感情难断；爱情难求；人情难还；友情难得；真情难找；无情难受；你的情呢难忘！
16/3/2007 8:42am
一大早就有人好气，感觉蛮爽的，哈哈。自投罗网:P
老虎本来就应该跑得很快很快，不可轻易停下来给枪射中！
16/3/2007 2:57pm 4:05pm 10:09pm
Yindeh, I know you’d kill me,,,
But you know, as I was dreaming while doing my assignment, the photos-screensaver came out. Your funny face juz made me laugh and started to do my work again. Haha. Love you mien. Dunno how you can always make so many kinds of stupid silly faces!
Mien. 2 guys & 2 kids came to see the house. Seems like wanna buy the apartment. Then when they ask to see my room, once open so 准 yeh’s big monkey face pop out from my laptop and the two men were laughing. Mien.
Okies, today is a grand adventure! Before I went for class, yen called!! From aussie!! How unexpected…then went to college, the good old taxi driver bring me over to sunway FOC, so I only paid rm3. how nice. then had a quick dinner with saji, ok, that was a torture, eating so fast coz late liao. And splendidly, got 8/10 for my LAN MORAL test! Hahaha, so the unexpected. I’m orang yang bermoral after aLL!! Haha. After class ended up joining saji’s terrific Indian-chinese-english family to eat, but look more like Indian family lor. Then the mamak guy was looking and looking, and finally came up to ask if I had relations with them. Saji said they adopted me. Haha, great.
18/3/2007 12:27pm
Rong’s bday. Family at home having a dog session? Haha, since when we became a “love dogs” family? Five dogs at home now! Too bad me & ben is out of the circle to join in the fun. Thinking of my coming bday…how pathetic would my 21st bday be? Sniff sniff~~ Lotsa ppl out there’s planning for their grand 21st. daddy’s gonna step into his ‘big 5’ too!! Wow.
I woke up so tired and refused to go to class. So decided to join the afternoon session only. Mum asked and I told her I skipped morning class, but she din hear me. So 2nd time I juz so NATURALLY lied that this module has less hours to attend. Today afternoon then start class. Ishh, why lie? Haha, notty gal. but I really din purposely lie. I DID tell her :P She’d be furious if she knows I’m watching movie instead. Mien, 〈一公升眼泪〉really will make you 流一公升泪！now after crying eyes lagi tired. Haha. But it was SYOK when I sneezed out all the 鼻涕 stuck in there! Haha. Dun dare watch liao, need wait my nose recover from redness then go class. Terrible.
26/3/2007 11:21pm
今天意外地兴奋。嘻嘻嘻。
不要想太多真的比较快了：）
希望不是那种今天high了明天down！哭给你看。
27/3/2007 9:34pm
真的。没有出乎意料的down。为什么？
不想不想不想出门！
出去还要摆那张可爱的笑脸，发出那假死的笑声。
真是讨厌死了。
可是我不想让她陪我烦。
电话也暂时给它死掉，不要他找我。
讨厌他最近的撒娇，恶心！我又不是他的谁。
就是没feel还能怎样。
Tonite very no mood la. And got minor flu pula. Was so high in sbux today. So hardworking and busy but fun. And got good to talk to punya leng zhai supervisor to work with gok. But why after dinner suddenly so no mood one. Thinking of so many things one. Even little little wishes I expected cannot come true. i never asked much. Everything should just be simple. Why so complicated. What should I do. homework also piling. Due liao but still so lenggang. Wat happen. The old me shud be panicking. This me like not bothered. Tmr tmr n tmr. i’m a piece of deadmeat. Is it like wat yaya said, she once lost direction dunno wat she wanted. Then she watched a series and found her way again. Me leh? I know what I want. But I dunno what I REALLY want. Mao dun. Mao dun. Mao dun. Life is like all jumbled up. But thinking back, what is life if it is a monotonous one? Should I decide my life, or let time decide my life? Should I take risks, or let risks take over me? Should I accept love, or let love bury me? Should I be the opened up me, or the closed up me? But which one am i? oh……
15/3/2007 11:59pm
妈妈第一次叫我睡迟一点？每次都骂我这么爱睡！
哎哟，恋家恋友恋情周。怎么又来了？
感情难断；爱情难求；人情难还；友情难得；真情难找；无情难受；你的情呢难忘！
16/3/2007 8:42am
一大早就有人好气，感觉蛮爽的，哈哈。自投罗网:P
老虎本来就应该跑得很快很快，不可轻易停下来给枪射中！
16/3/2007 2:57pm 4:05pm 10:09pm
Yindeh, I know you’d kill me,,,
But you know, as I was dreaming while doing my assignment, the photos-screensaver came out. Your funny face juz made me laugh and started to do my work again. Haha. Love you mien. Dunno how you can always make so many kinds of stupid silly faces!
Mien. 2 guys & 2 kids came to see the house. Seems like wanna buy the apartment. Then when they ask to see my room, once open so 准 yeh’s big monkey face pop out from my laptop and the two men were laughing. Mien.
Okies, today is a grand adventure! Before I went for class, yen called!! From aussie!! How unexpected…then went to college, the good old taxi driver bring me over to sunway FOC, so I only paid rm3. how nice. then had a quick dinner with saji, ok, that was a torture, eating so fast coz late liao. And splendidly, got 8/10 for my LAN MORAL test! Hahaha, so the unexpected. I’m orang yang bermoral after aLL!! Haha. After class ended up joining saji’s terrific Indian-chinese-english family to eat, but look more like Indian family lor. Then the mamak guy was looking and looking, and finally came up to ask if I had relations with them. Saji said they adopted me. Haha, great.
18/3/2007 12:27pm
Rong’s bday. Family at home having a dog session? Haha, since when we became a “love dogs” family? Five dogs at home now! Too bad me & ben is out of the circle to join in the fun. Thinking of my coming bday…how pathetic would my 21st bday be? Sniff sniff~~ Lotsa ppl out there’s planning for their grand 21st. daddy’s gonna step into his ‘big 5’ too!! Wow.
I woke up so tired and refused to go to class. So decided to join the afternoon session only. Mum asked and I told her I skipped morning class, but she din hear me. So 2nd time I juz so NATURALLY lied that this module has less hours to attend. Today afternoon then start class. Ishh, why lie? Haha, notty gal. but I really din purposely lie. I DID tell her :P She’d be furious if she knows I’m watching movie instead. Mien, 〈一公升眼泪〉really will make you 流一公升泪！now after crying eyes lagi tired. Haha. But it was SYOK when I sneezed out all the 鼻涕 stuck in there! Haha. Dun dare watch liao, need wait my nose recover from redness then go class. Terrible.
26/3/2007 11:21pm
今天意外地兴奋。嘻嘻嘻。
不要想太多真的比较快了：）
希望不是那种今天high了明天down！哭给你看。
27/3/2007 9:34pm
真的。没有出乎意料的down。为什么？
不想不想不想出门！
出去还要摆那张可爱的笑脸，发出那假死的笑声。
真是讨厌死了。
可是我不想让她陪我烦。
电话也暂时给它死掉，不要他找我。
讨厌他最近的撒娇，恶心！我又不是他的谁。
就是没feel还能怎样。
Thursday, March 01, 2007
脑的部落克
心口闷闷的
鼻子酸酸的
告诉眼睛想哭就哭
不要强忍
可是理智骂我为什么要眼睛哭
心又不会痛
眼泪不想听理智的话
可是眼睛却听它的话
拼命把眼泪眨回去
心告诉眼泪：“我很坚强，我会好好的。”
眼泪回答：
“你听过雨过天晴吗？
雨，会带走地面的灰尘，让空气更清新。
我只想把你表面上那像灰尘的‘痛’带走。
虽然我不一定能把所有的‘痛’都带走，
但至少你会感觉到自己轻了很多，很多......
这样你也会更坚强。”
心说：
“你说得对，但就是这些‘痛’才能让我知道自己会有多坚强。”
眼泪拿心没办法
只好什么都不做
其实，心知道眼泪是怎样都洗不掉这些‘痛’的
因为心的表面在之前所受的种种伤害而破了好多的洞
这些‘痛’早已掉进这些洞，
在这5年里和‘快乐’一起慢慢的添满整颗心
满到没地方添了所以才铺满心的表面
就算眼泪能洗掉这些‘痛’，它也不想让眼泪这么做
因为它不想连‘快乐’也被洗掉
它知道只有‘爱’和‘时间’才能把这些‘痛’化成‘回忆’
所以......
它要开始寻找‘爱’和 ‘时间’......
鼻子酸酸的
告诉眼睛想哭就哭
不要强忍
可是理智骂我为什么要眼睛哭
心又不会痛
眼泪不想听理智的话
可是眼睛却听它的话
拼命把眼泪眨回去
心告诉眼泪：“我很坚强，我会好好的。”
眼泪回答：
“你听过雨过天晴吗？
雨，会带走地面的灰尘，让空气更清新。
我只想把你表面上那像灰尘的‘痛’带走。
虽然我不一定能把所有的‘痛’都带走，
但至少你会感觉到自己轻了很多，很多......
这样你也会更坚强。”
心说：
“你说得对，但就是这些‘痛’才能让我知道自己会有多坚强。”
眼泪拿心没办法
只好什么都不做
其实，心知道眼泪是怎样都洗不掉这些‘痛’的
因为心的表面在之前所受的种种伤害而破了好多的洞
这些‘痛’早已掉进这些洞，
在这5年里和‘快乐’一起慢慢的添满整颗心
满到没地方添了所以才铺满心的表面
就算眼泪能洗掉这些‘痛’，它也不想让眼泪这么做
因为它不想连‘快乐’也被洗掉
它知道只有‘爱’和‘时间’才能把这些‘痛’化成‘回忆’
所以......
它要开始寻找‘爱’和 ‘时间’......
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
I always so spontaneously push my way into the circle but sometimes i am met by turned backs.
Disappointed as i can be, desperate as i can be, but i just like things the way they were (or should be).
I cannot bear being one of those easily forgotten people, so important at the time, so special, so influential, and so treasured, yet years later just a vague face and a distant memory...
Disappointed as i can be, desperate as i can be, but i just like things the way they were (or should be).
I cannot bear being one of those easily forgotten people, so important at the time, so special, so influential, and so treasured, yet years later just a vague face and a distant memory...
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
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