Saturday, April 15, 2006

the idiot and the idiotic XXX

love to smile. yea. but at the correct time. yea.
today has been a tough day. i finally said it out! omigosh. should feel like something big has been released. but no, tension juga. it's only the first day since i said it and i'm already feeling so terrible. i never knew that i was such a big influence to them. something to feel proud of, but makes me sad-der to leave too. some more today a 3yr-old came with a chocolate cake specially for teacher angie!! i'm not even his class teacher! (only spending the afternoon-one-hours with him!) asked him why gimme the cake. "coz u like mah." then he juz kept smiling. i was too happy to even talk. i only remembered that i scolded him till he cried and hit me that day. all i can manage that time was a hug for him.

well, in the car. jane was crying. terkejut, then all the way home i dunno what to say. went to pick up her fren, and she made me join her yam-cha. so i ended up sitting on the coffee table with an ahpek & 2 ahmu(s). burrRP!! after that i walked home. i smiled to the first thing i saw on the way back. only that the other party was looking at me as if "who the hell are you?" only i realised that he was a CAT!! hahaha :D i smiled to a cat??? omigosh~ can't believe it mien!!! i smiled to a totally black idiotic cat!!! well, should say that i'm the idiot =P

reached home and i got another bday necklace from mexen & boyboy. ma said nai gimme angpow today gok, but at home la. lee cheche gave me a shirt exactly like hers pula 2 days ago. wow, this year's birthday is lonnnnnnnnnng! celebrated since the 2nd. wooooooohoo~

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

little little hopes

like you wrote:
fragile is the tiny heart
as strong as it tries to be

longing only for a soft reflection
but blankness creeps in silently

how nice if these little little hopes of ours bloomed more often?

Angie, your true color is Green!

You're green, the color of growth and vigor. Good-hearted and giving, you have a knack for finding and bringing out the best in people. Green is the most down-to-earth color in the spectrum — reliable and trustworthy. People know they can count on you to be around in times of need, since your concern for people is genuine and sincere. You take pride in being a good friend. For you, success is measured in terms of personal achievement and growth, not by status or position. Rare as emeralds, greens are wonderful, natural people. It truly is your color!

hah, this is the result from the Tickle test. and i like it :)

Sunday, April 02, 2006

i want ME back!!

"The art of life is to know how to enjoy a little and to endure very much." -- William Hazlitt
i just saw that quote and learnt a new word, endure. art of life wor. so kelian one ah. enjoy little, endure much. haiih.

Many things seem to be happening these two weeks. some are bad, but there're good ones. but i dunno why i'm just feeling not right. others might not realise but i can feel the stupid idiotic fake smile myself. yerrr~ why like dat?! i don't like this ME. please get me back... :(


For now, i can only sum up everything i've learned about life in three words: it goes on.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

给我力量!

2006年3月24日。你好吗?我不好。竟敢朦喳喳到差点给电单车撞倒!感觉上一整个礼拜都不好,不过却一副若无其事的老模样。相信在这陌生的地方没有人会看穿我。

忽然一直期待、从来听不厌的信息声响了……“多微笑少苦恼,若不笑心浮燥,胡乱笑没必要,开心笑心境好,苦心笑人易老,欺人笑少为妙,会心笑有礼貌,成功笑不骄傲,如何笑心知道,愿你快乐每一天。”有时很讨厌fwd msg,不过这封好像来得正好。看了蛮安慰的。他说昨天第一次看我发脾气。莫名其妙,做么会酱说?你骂我。哈哈,有吗?(回想昨天)谁叫你miscall错时间啊?活该。我只说再惹我的话我会骂人啊,哈哈。

上课时简直不能专心。一gang七个,只有两个到。我们还是答应对方会出席才去的咧,她生病,我心情超down累死。不过很高兴彼此可以发泄啦,毕竟目前她与我遭遇差不多,比较了解彼此心情。

谢谢有安全巴士。回来后在小亭里坐着讲电话。地板多肮脏也不管了,只知道我非常需要那一股力量!他的魔力就是这么神奇。原本要说的很多东西,很多都没说出口。一瞬间,烦恼很多都被无聊的埋怨声和笑声掩盖了。没有特别的话题,却能感到那份温暖。这时候的时间总是过得很快……我忘记跟妈妈报平安!结果被骂到爽。

宵夜。应该是晚餐吧。回来这里,就是准备倾听她的烦恼。习惯了。不过无所谓,只要我拿回了力量 :)

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

look young vs look matured

hmm...some ppl juz love to look mature, but me, only at times. coz most of the time i prefer to look young! but there're situations when u feel awkward or dunno how to even react. e.g.
-- going out with a friend your same age, then a person daringly said that your friend looks like 25yr-old, and kept calling you 小妹妹, how's that feeling?
-- out with a fren whom ppl said is your brother. even with real siblings ppl seldom said we look alike. one said i'm his older sister, one said i'm his younger sister. so???
-- ppl guessing your age, like dun dare to guess. there's one experience a woman ask her kids to call me "aunty-che che". (coz i was with my colleague and they're 40+) omigosh. please la. can't forget that.

well, well, whatever. most importantly, be happy. and feel young :)

Monday, February 27, 2006

Funny Quote!

"I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap." --- Bob Hope
haha, just thought it was funny. so wrote it down.

today's the last class of this module and next week's my exam. haiih. well, i was squeaking with excitement when i got the timetable for the next module! haha. coz...coz....i won't have classes on Sundays for the following 2 months!! How wonderfuL!! Friday nights are off too! Saturdays 9 to 6 as usual lo. Kesian some of my frens lo, haha. can't imagine 9 to 5pm every Sunday studying LAN M'sian studies. had to laugh. coz while they're yawning in class, i might be wandering around having fun! or at least snuggling in bed. haha.

do you often have moments when u saw something and you thought of someone? well, i ALWAYS. it's good and bad. like today, i saw a niu niu then i suddenly remembered of yaya. called to ask Ben the exact date & it's today. still in time to wish her happy bday :) but most of the time those 'whatever' things make you miss that person so much although all the happy memories again appears like it's just YESTERDAY.

Sunday, February 19, 2006

my kissing monkeys

These are my kissing monkeys at home. supposedly to give out one but thought they were too cute to be separated. and i found a really good place for them. my cupboard. would have attached the video if i knew how to. everyone who saw the live show would laugh and love it. haha. muakss~~

i just seem to start thinking of home again. anything that resembles home. okies, nitey. goodnite kiss ^*^

Fridays vs Mondays

Well, most people would love Fridays and not Mondays. they call it Monday blues. as for me, both days are not as great. Mondays i gotta wake up too early to wait. Fridays are tiring, especially when there're night classes, and when i have to look for ppl to send me home. won't dare to take the late bus anymore ^_^ one time scary experience is enough. i just hate to be alone.

Nadia took MC on Friday, and David scared my life off. how could he? bringing his emotions to the class, sighing all day long. and even asked me to do such a thing! unbelievable. 22 in a class, shout until i wanna die. help la, sit there got what use wor. how can my dear voice ever recover wor? sometimes i think i'm really too low-paid la, just because the college introduced me as a student, i had to work more but get less pay compared to them? so unfair. the older ppl are all good to me, just that sometimes i dunno whether i should trust them. sometimes i think i'm too soft-hearted, putting myself in a dilemma. since i made my decision to leave after May, i better. cannot xin ruan all the time. joo said, "learn to be good to yourself." ying said, "learn to stand for yourself. i can't be your 24h angel." i always remembered these.

That Friday nite was the boring class, and again Saturday whole day. i couldn't stand and was kinda sleeping. really can't open my eyes. Her lectures...hard to understand, boring & telling jokes that are not funny at all. we purposely chose a table for only 4 during lunch. she sat with us 2times already, and even lunch wasn't fun. so we decided to be bad today, she really did came by, (eh, today no extra place ah?), we juz smiled, haha. sorrylah, bopien. have to see her whole day, at least give us 1hr without her ma. aduhh. go join the old group la, why join us young gang wor?

I always take the bus & has made it a habit to add the numbers everytime i took the ticket. there was one day when i had 21 for all the 3times i took the bus on the same day! it was said that it'd be your lucky day. i had 21 again this morning. i don't know if it really makes your day lucky, and is even more not sure if the luck can be transferred to your loved ones. haha. but one thing i'm sure, it makes me happy. i'm always happy when i got 21.

better sleep. tomoro got drama class. kakaka.

Saturday, February 18, 2006

The day after valentine's...

I woke early but was lazing in bed, until i cannot resist the smell of laksa. i decided to drive, so i don't have to think so much. after 2 weeks of enjoyment & relaxation at home, it's like the most dreadful thing going back to work! berat hati, but i always acted cool during departures, only silly yindeh made me cry like stupid before when she left. xxxx ah. well i had yummy laksa for breakfast, and kueh chap lunch with daddy. the food wasn't great, but it's the feeling eating with only daddy, daddy-daughter chats i just enjoy so much! I thought I'd cry this time, but nope! daddy gave me a hug and soon i was waving to him 10m apart. berat hati lah.

now i'm alone. gate A8. long way. i went to the toilet & dropped my NOKIA, internally not injured but had cuts on the side of its face. my BODY GLOVE trousers' button came off too. what bad luck. then i went the wrong way, coz the arrow was pointing forward but you actually should walk down the stairs. ishhh. when i reached gate A8, two little twin sisters (i supposed 2yr+) suddenly came up to me smiling then use their botles as guns to shoot me. pong pong pong! then they laugh. then their parents laugh. then i laugh. weird la. after that it's boring waiting until it's time to board.

this was how. hot sun. first time see the plane so near, so just took a picture. haha. well, it was a boring flight. i was sleeping most of the time, but towards the end my ear and neck felt uncomfortable so i started noticing ppl around me. i didn't manage to get a seat by the window. the lady beside me was sleeping, but the guy was opening his legs so big, hands already at my place, had to close my legs so tight so he cannot accidentally touch my thigh. (not that i think too much, but he did and i am a thigh-itchy-freak! i nearly wanted to scream at him.) the flight reached 10mins earlier. but waited for the luggage quite long too. jane's husband came late, so i read Rong's letter. (he said i could only read it when i reach KL, so i kept my promise) here it is:

hahaha, i laughed so hard when i read it. he's always so cute when you're not with him. if not, monsta is the only word to describe this little brother!

Finally i was fetched up after almost an hour. it was raining really heavily. dunno it's the ahpek eyes or what, (though the wipers are ot really good la) he drove so dangerously my heart was thumping. i had to open my eyes so big to see the roads for me, uncle here uncle there. got car ah. aiyer. it was quite weird alone with him in the car too. it seems normal during quiet moments with family members & dearer friends, but with him...awkward la. nearly met with an accident too, coz he was driving on the opposite lane and din hear me. the van was right in front of us! scared my life off @@

well, at least i got the chance to get to subang first b4 going to jane's house. but guess what, i haven't had time to even rest awhile, Yen was ready and we went down to Asia cafe straight away. she wanted us to escape the fussy owner. chatted and had dinner. but the owner was still here, so we had to go to the comic shop to waste time. so tired la, but still had to read. 2 comics i read. then finally can come back. dunno how i walk, i fell down 2 steps off the stairs, and got a beautiful bruise on my higher butt. back bath. so tired. jane called pula, said she's coming in 10mins. what the hell?! her fren came in Merz with her to pick me to her house. gossips, gossips, gossips. and her daughter kacau kacau my things liao. omigosh. they finally left me alone at 12am, but till then i couldn't sleep though i was so tired. yindeh asked me to think of the 19candles, but it was raining so hard, doesn't suit the mood. i miss the smell of my comfy bed(their smell so strong, ewww), miss talking to yindeh till we fell aslept, and miss hugging my NiCi to sleep too. i miss him. but i slept too in the end, dunno what time la.

not before long at about 5:30am, i had to wake up again. opened my eyes to realise that i'm in another world again, far away from home sweet home ^^ i miss you all. all take care ya!

Thursday, February 09, 2006

The Believer

When you are a Believer, anything is possible. Your imagination is fresh with promises and dreams. Your heart is a happier place knowing they will someday come true.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

7th February

today i had to wake early to follow dad. omigosh, i asked my sis how we could ever wake up during school days?! that was like reach school 7am? if got RC duty, then...wow!! how could i do that in kuching? hoho. different life. 7am is my usual time in KL, exception of some extraordinaries...well, daddy brought me for laksa as i wished, we sat down & realised that the laksa stall was closed! mum asked dad to go another shop. haha. so dad actually stood up & brought us to another shop! unfortunately, that stall was again closed. i paiseh to ask dad go another shop la, so i had mee jawa. 4times oredi lo. 1st time is when the 4 of us went Green Road to eat. no laksa. yesterday went with yeh to ChunYuan also no laksa. kolo-mee for replacement. luckily the kolo-mee was nice :)

replaced my ATM card, and i asked for an account book, but they said the newer accounts no need account books one. so weird. after that, i came home. got Nadia's call, from the kindy. and the kids were singing for me, and the call ended with the kids altogether saying, "Teacher Angie, we want you! we love you!" omigosh, they just sound sooo cute. i miss them too, but definitely not my workplace. these kids...they're adorable. how would it be having kids of my own in the future? hehehe, nice thinking about it at times.

after that i went to sleep and accidentally skipped lunch. siaw chabo. woke up to tidy & vacuum & mop my room. then CJ invited me to Kenny Height family park. Had my hands on the bike once again, after a really long time! only 15mins (but non-stop) then it started to rain, we went uphill in the drizzles...abit wet but it was fun. when i got down the bike, i felt like i was flying, my legs were so soft i nearly fell down. haha. too long no exercise, that's it. the sweat made me feel 爽!

dad & mum came home. durians. helped to carry & stupiadd. the torns on the durian left my upper calf with 5 scratches. ouchh. had dinner. watched ying's favourite korean movie <对不起,我爱你>。it's stupid but it still captures your attention. Ben always came in when they started to kiss. and it makes him excited, haha, that's what we kacau him. CJ used his toenail to scratch my thigh. a little piece of skin came off. then he laid his head on my thighs, enjoying being a baby. then dreadful Rong came jumping on us. ying & me were saying, "How can we ever grow up in this family? having so little brothers at home, having to act childish & fight with them almost everyday?"

every advertisement me & dee were like checking our phones for messages. dunno, juz today, like we're desperate waiting for mails. my phone seems quiet, except few messages from Jac & Yen. so i smsed ying when she wa still i dad's room, "Stupiad XXXX, i noe u gonna check your phone now! =P" so i went down to get water. when i came up my message tone rang, i knew it was her, but she pretended to look so innocent. blah. lousy actor lah. actually U look funny!! haahaha!!

played around with my new camera. got a good shot of daddy wanting to smack Rong. but he said it'll spoil his image, so he tickled me & got the camera over, just to delete it! notty dadda!! online. shan said yeh just offline, then awhile she also gone, left me with her sis. blablabla...i'm not gonna elaborate this part. boring.

well, actually i was juz trying to see how much i can write for a day. not purposely thinking, just writing spontaneously. coz i realised that my mails are always the longest but i dunno why. juz type nia ma. lo-so gie. quite a lot to write for today too. call it a day. gotta sleep liao...zzzZ...

Monday, January 23, 2006

quotes i like...

You can take a road that gets you to the stars.
I can take a road that will see me through :)


When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth. ---Bill (4yr-old)

The most beautiful things in the world can neither be seen nor touched, just felt in the heart. --- Helen Keller

The happiest people are those who seem to have no particular reason for being happy, except that they are so.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

SEVEN minus one

Get to know the differences between impairment, disabilities vs handicap, disabilities vs difficulties. this lecturer actually took around half an hour to explain this! "Don't ever misuse these terms!" i'm actually a handicap tonite. (not gonna explain here)

hmm...my dear family back in Kuching was having their supper at Pizza Hut! must be again mummy's idea. dad juz love her to have a round apple face and he loved the photo with her sexy belly! hohoho ~~~ mum called and said, "Juz suddenly miss you coz there's an empty seat here. SEVEN minus one." i know... i miss them so much too =.= feel like flying back straight away to get my share of family's pizza!!

but guess wat i was doing right then? haha, PACKING. packing new clothes into the briefcase, ready to go home. i was actually tidying up the room la, so might as well pack first! 19 days. should be fast! mum and dad were laughing heads over heels, but another woman out there was saying "siaw mian-mian". who else?? sms la. peace. haha :P

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

CORNTOS

Once you’ve tasted Corntos, there’s no going back. It reveals a new pleasure you never would’ve thought possible. Call it excitement. Call it sheer thrill. Call it anything you want. Corntos opens you to a new world of flavours. It’s an experience that you’ll want to enjoy over and over again. Corntos. Try it, you’ll see the light.

Monday, January 02, 2006

'alone time'

i heard an adult tell another busy adult saying, "Don't you think you need some 'alone time'? free from everyone, doing anything you like or just nothing!" I did it right after that. the next day. and i really enjoyed it. it's not the loneliness you feel when you're alone. (coz i hate to be alone) it's just that little time you need just for YOURSELF. i went to Midvalley an hour or two on my own, walking the mall as i wish. it's the only time i feel that i have a sense of direction. hah. WALKING IS THE BEST REMEDY FOR STRESS. i think.

only after that only i met up with frens. and he asked me why i was wearing spects once he saw me. alamak. and you know what the kids at the kinder said? once i wiped my spects and juz hang it on my shirt to play with them. then a girl asked me why i wasn't wearing my spects. "you look like...(thinking)...a monster." i laugh till wanna pengsan. and purposely went forward towards her with my eyes wide open! (but still small, haha)

hmm...one thing you have to experience is squishing each other in the train!! just imagine. it's totally packed. every space is occupied!! and when that somebody farted, you still have to stand on your spot, giving your nose a GOOD treat!! humph!

oh ya, i found another way to release stress. eat 开心果。it's called PISTACHIOS. and i like the name. sounds special. pis(stress,stress, piss off! i wanna...) ta(big--mandarin) chio(laugh--hokkien). then take a long shower. haha, ignore the translation. i'm just being crazy. but it's what i did and thought of when i ate 开心果 just now. coz i just heard that tomoro i might have to go work ^_^

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

my treasure of SMSsss

dearest momma only started sms-ing after i came to KL, and she's improving fast! sometimes SO short-cut that u have to read over and over again to understand. well, i enjoy it when we talk through the phone using codes. hehe. all i have to do is "Mmm"/"Ya"/"yes"/"no"... and give little hints, then mama can interpret all. very 'keng' one. daddy and yindeh still need more practice, haha.

some of mummy's sms i'd like to treasure, but my phone memory is running out of space. so i'll save them here :) this point i'm like mummy, but i didn't record every one la. mum said she record almost all her sms le. and one day daddy was too free and decided to help mum delete messages...but got bombed instead!!! haha, kelian.

-- A mum is owes a mum care luv n anyth a mum can
-- got eat n eat what everyday have to care n woory 5 babies till one day 2 oldy pension got five time two care wa dream now
-- you a very smart know mum english actually know the word till too happy cant spell worry
-- Dont think hard now mum and dad are your best supporter advisor or what you think must record what you do will talk tonight

no punctuations. see if u understand. haha.

yindeh's...
-- dear Gie dont be sad, dont be discouraged. Smile like u always do :>n u will make it thru. (041124)
-- That's y lor!! U must learn2 stand 4 urself. I learnt that while in KL. Even i wan jaga u but cant b ur 24h angel u know dear. So u must 'seng muk' ok! Nitey. (050311)
-- Gie gie miss u la. N worried bout u 2. Now u cant even check mail..i hope ur college can online? It better. U very the brave u know. U are my new idol. Rest! (050912)
-- HahaHahaHaha I CANT STOP LAUGHING MIEN! Shot by a CAT??! Now that's the funniest thig i've ever heard mien Hahaa U really cheered me up mien! ((051217)

bendie's...
-- Gie ar gie...how's everything? Poor u...cheer up...me finally semester exam finiz liao...now rest 1st den awhile more wan spm liao...u jia you oh...(051029)
-- Nitez...slp wel n haf some rest...dun think bout it 1st...throw it away...haha...sweet dreams...(051029)
-- just finiz a nice bath...cool... 1 more month, gie... 1 ore month...wil be waitin 4 u...(051212)
-- (cute picture shooting) GAMBATEI give u power 4 everything!! Haha...jia you oh...(051215)
-- good nite and jia you oh...use e power i gave u...haha...try 2 slp earlier...sweet dreamzzzZZZ...(051215)

hmmm...these are the messages i treasure from home...just so sweet and encouraging during bad times. as for daddy, he prefers to call directly. mum too actually, but there are times when she plays sms. CJ ah, dun say. Rong, haha, always tell me he got surprise for me. then tell me all. haha. cute la him.

there're sweet messages from friends and bf too. but some will be kept confidentiaL!! hehe
miss u aLL and everybody at home ^^

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

The Kissing ‘GAME’

I thought I’ve escaped from the Kissing Monster at home, but I never knew I have more ‘keng’ ones here!! Believe it not, he can kiss everywhere, EVERYWHERE! I mean ANYwhere! Omigosh…just imagine, your neck, your back, your feet!! Worst thing is I felt so ticklish, and when I said, “Enough of these! Get off NOW!” “But I like you.” Worse came to worst, the 3rd or 4th party came by and just jumped on me. “No! this is my teacher!” “My teacher!” “My teacher!” ~~fighting, fighting~~ “OK, OK. I’m EVERONE’S TEACHER, OK??” So……the kissing game starts AGAIN, but with more monsters. Just got glued to the floor until really cannot tahan, then gather all my force to stand up right, letting the bugs fall to the floor and laugh to myself. Haha, kidding. See how my mood goes! Today I’m in good mood :)

Today, I looked closely at my hands, which are called the ‘tauhu’ hands. Haha. Remembered the days they suddenly held my hands to other friends just to touch my hands. Terkejut saya. Pengsan. But now, it’s so ‘kelian’. I feel the muscles growing with the fat, currently 2 small bruises from dunno where, 3 little pieces of peeled skin from toddler’s fingernails, 2 minor tooth marks from a naughty baby! It makes me envy yindeh’s hand now. My twin hands. Haha. And another thing, my hands always reminds me of papa. The spots (oki/otiam, whatever you call it) inherited from papa. More and more are appearing. Dunno when they popped out!! Hmm…daddy’s girl. I miss daddy.

Monday, December 19, 2005

How's your soul today?

Is there a day when you kept shouting for your soul-mate(s) but 'respond' has never arrived?

Today's a nice day until after exam, when i felt waist-ache, thanks to my diarrhea. maybe i was dehydrated and yet i only slept an hour. but i should say that last nite was some memories i got back as a student. me and WLing was sms-ing each other to keep each other awake. the funniest thing was that both of us ended up on the 3-minute toilet bowl. Saji & SYee drifted off first. haha. It's dreadful reminding ourselves that we're working ppl now. what a hectic life. often discussing life in university, rather than our tuition-like college. such boredom!!

now an amusing dream i have to jot down. in my dream there's another dream, me & dee were having the same dream, but it seems so real! This is 2/3 nights back. Well, to summarise, Ben was shot dead by a CAT! Ben's 1st response was, "choi ar!" and dee, "hahaHaHaHAHA...u make me can't stop laughing, gie!! you made my day!! but a CAT?! and gun??" okies, this made me laugh back. no choice. WHY? coz Ben kept spanking the cat and it finally acted up! this might be a lesson to teach Ben not to be so aggressive, and must have self-control. ok, it's just a DREAM. and noe wat? dreaming is good for you. i juz read about it. To 'o-lo' back the victim in my dream, i gotta say that he's became a sweet(er) guy/brother since he became a boyfren. sometimes his sms can juz cheer you UP!! thanx, Bendie :)

going back to reality. i have to go on with life which is not so life, i call it. especially tonite. i've caught a fever. freezing juz now. but it's assignment time. deadmeat. torture. it's slaughtering me with hideous cruelty!!!